Thought of the Day 

If you want to be a winner, act like a winner. Act like the person you aim to be.

It works.

If you worry about your desire never manifesting, you are giving out the signal of being a dissatisfied individual – was that your aim?

Believe in yourself and aim to manifest all your desires.

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4 thoughts on “Thought of the Day 

  1. Hi Nina *Long post*

    I saw your instagram pic below with the doggies! Nawww! 🙂 Woof! Hehe!

    I think I found what it was that has made me not manifest this situation with my guy, after stumbling across my old posts back in Feb this year (*cringe*) And nutting it out with a friend last night – maybe you could tell me what you think?

    I don’t think it is forgiveness. I think it is ACCEPTANCE. The opposite of resistance is acceptance, yes? Which is something I have never been good at and something I have always seen as my ‘life lesson.’ I don’t accept easily and I am known to never give up, which is basically lacking acceptance. I’ve always been that way. It’s good in some situations, but not all.

    Today I accepted the whole situation. All of it. How he is, how he has been and how he is with his family. I put myself in his shoes and got a different perspective. I looked at it from his point of view of why he has chosen to be that close to his family. Just to keep this brief I wont write down all the reasons why I know he made a choice to do it. The things he told me. His problems making friends at school, etc. It wasn’t just thrust upon him, his relationship with his parents, deep down he wants to be there because if he didn’t, he wouldn’t be there. From things we had spoken about before – I think there’s a lack of confidence and self esteem which is what made him stay with his parents. They are safe, can’t hurt him, etc, at least that’s how he sees it.

    I stopped looking at him as having problems and realized that he has probably done the best he can despite having the family he does. I don’t mean that with ill intention. You’ll see further down what I mean by that.

    I never mentioned this before, but the day I met him we were at a course. I was never meant to be there, I was dragged along by someone, so in the last few moments both he and I joined up. I saw him crying that day. The fact is he’s been under tremendous stress trying to recoup the money that was lost. I know he’s been going to these courses because he feels responsible for what happened. He doesn’t just do these courses for himself, he does them for his parents so he can work on them also. I know because he suspects that they all have negative beliefs around money, or had. I don’t know what the present situation is.

    Since I accepted the whole situation this morning – Those things I kept doing stopped. I HAVE been feeling like I am fighting (in my head) against the whole thing BECAUSE I COULD NEVER ACCEPT THE RELATIONSHIP HE HAS WITH HIS MOTHER. I wasn’t jealous, I was repulsed. It was a feeling of repulsion and I kept seeing him as weak, which to be honest he is, but I know he didn’t become that way on his own. Without getting into the whole mother thing just from what he read that night, her text was enough to see why he is the fearful, untrusting person he is.

    What was happening was I would visualize or affirm it was mine and in around 30 seconds after doing something around this situation with him – it was all undone by my thoughts. At first I thought the thoughts were some kind of protection mechanism to protect myself from getting hurt and then I thought it was some kind of self sabotage around being and receiving love, but after speaking to a friend about it I heard myself say I could FEEL what the real issue was. Repulsion. Then you look at how he spoke to me, made me feel = REPULSION. That he couldn’t possibly be with me because I wasn’t his type = REPULSION. You get the picture.

    You better sit down for this bit… Haha…

    Then I started thinking….

    Does it make him a bad person for believing his mother even tho she fudged how wrong she got me?
    No. It doesn’t make him a bad person.
    You can’t expect him to do anything else when she’s very reality and fear based. How would you turn out if you lived with someone for 30 years who constantly cautious you all the time? Afraid? It wouldn’t take much to sway him after what has already happened to him.

    Does it make her a bad person for wanting to protect her kid? (Even tho she imagined the whole thing?)
    No. Even tho it would have been a good idea for her to have met me before making assumptions. She’s unconscious and afraid, that’s all – and I can tell from the photos that she isn’t happy within herself.

    We can go over and over with the BUT’s and reasoning after saying No to the questions, but what is the opposite to fear? Love.

    WHAT IF IT WAS A GOOD THING THAT THEY ARE CLOSE? Did you just fall off your chair? *Helps Nina back onto her chair *

    You may be about to fall off again…

    What if I let go of the fear that I have been secretly feeling but haven’t told anyone? My fear that I would always be second to his parents – but also, does that even matter if i am? Must I be the center of attention? I love my free time – does he always have to be there? Do I have to monitor him or what he is telling people? Do I really need to care that he tells his parents everything? Does it matter, really? Does it mean he will tell them everything about us? Probably or maybe not. Does it matter though? Because If I am treating him right and he is happy and so am I, then what exactly am I worried about him telling them?

    Granted I HAVE seen a friends mothers ‘look’ and hope for problems (because they were lonely and neglected their own marriages and themselves always expecting their husbands to make them happy) were there was no problems and his mum might even do that, but again, does that even matter what she does?

    If I am secure within myself and our relationship does it matter that he is close to his parents? That is what has been driving my fear all the time and making the resistance – that I would be last and he wouldn’t keep our relationship private.

    Now, where exactly have I gotten this thing of ‘he will put me last’ from? Other people. Women who write mammoth comments of their epic battles on websites about how bad their life is on ‘he’s a mummies boy’ websites. Why are these women so upset? The real question is WHY are they fighting to be number one? Isn’t the fighting causing them to attract even MORE fighting?

    It was MY FEAR that made the whole situation worse. I already knew what I was getting myself into. I knew from the day I saw him walking down the alley that he was on the phone to his mum. He didn’t tell me, i could just tell. Just like those women KNEW that they were marrying men who were close to their mothers, also known as mummies boys. THEY KNEW BEFORE they married these guys. When I was reading these website comments I was panicking that that would be my life. Does that have to be my life? Can’t I make a different choice than what most of those women have made which has been to demand that they are first? WHY do they have to be first? Who made rules of which level a person is according to how you love them, first, second, whatever.

    Yes I know there are cases where the mother is a complete and utter nut but are these women not creating their own realities? Me included? The fear making it worse? The repulsion of him being close to his mother. Mmmmmm? 😉

    Why do we see men as weak for being close to their mothers but not daughters?

    Its like my friend the other night who MADE her boyfriend send his friend HOME and MADE him get into bed with her because she had a cold. Then they fought till the early hours of the morning. What makes women think they have to be number one in everything? Ekkkk! I remember I once wrote I feel sorry for men but now I really do. She had to be put first. It’s like friend number 2 that keeps going through so many guys, why are they never good enough? She mentioned that they didn’t ask her enough questions about herself. Do you see what I am getting at here? Why do women have such high expectations, probably expectations that they themselves can’t even live up too. Because both of them are insecure and need something outside of themselves to make themselves happy.

    WHAT IF OUR LIFE TURNED OUT GOOD? WHAT IF WE WERE HAPPY? WHAT IF HE WAS A MUMMY’S BOY FOREVER and we STILL had an amazing relationship?

    Then I came to the conclusion…

    Is it bad that they are close? The answer is…
    No.

    By this point you are probably thinking I have lost the plot? I haven’t.

    Acceptance lead to Unconditional love. Something I have been lacking the whole time while acting like the 2 girls above. Ekkkkkkk!

    Love you! Please let me know what you think! 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think you’re 100% right. You were putting time in being upset about his current circumstances and expressing negativity for him and his family instead of accepting them all which I usually simply describe as not being bothered by them. But that IS acceptance, like you said. It’s a VERY powerful word.
      Accepting their relationship fully is very sweet of you 🙂 Not to mention, entirely resistance free. I think it shows strength on your end. What is going to happen when you get together is that YOU influence him with your positive energy to eventually become a more courageous and relaxed person.
      I love this so much and I am so impressed and proud! 😀 Well done! xx

      Like

  2. Nina / LyLy

    After yesterday (see above) I have no problems with visualizing anymore. I can do it for ages without losing focus and I can see/feel him clearly.

    My resistance was not accepting his relationship with his family. All that work I’ve been doing all these months (Ekkk!) thinking it was this and that! And it was just not accepting his relationship with his parents.

    It was LyLy’s post that really made me start questioning why this kept coming up, the whole – try to do some work around it and always end up 30 seconds later ruining whatever I had tried to visualize.

    I can’t remember what she had said to C but either way for a few days I thought about some of the questions LyLy had asked C and then I found what it REALLY was.

    Thanks. x

    Liked by 1 person

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