Work with the Universe!

This is something you simply must do.

Working with the Universe means allowing yourself to feel good so that your desires manifest. Believing that what you want is yours already, a done deal or about to happen is all that it takes once you get out of your own way.

Getting out of your way is all about listening to your positive feelings which stem from your positive decisions. Even when you “have a feeling” that something good is about to happen, it is because you decided that something good is about to happen and followed the related feelings.

A choice, positive or negative, always comes first, from your conscious or subconscious mind.

Listen to your needs – only you can fulfil them. When you’re upset, make yourself feel better. Do whatever it takes to feel better. When you’re tired, rest. A positive attitude is a choice and so is positive thinking.

One of the most important ways of working with the Universe means choosing to do what makes you happy instead of staying in the space of “waiting” for your desire which can often make you feel incomplete. And you deserve better.

Refusing to let go equals refusing to be happy. In this case, one chooses not to be happy. The choice to change your thoughts from those related to your desire is yours. Think about other things, enjoy your life, be happy and allow manifestation to happen! If you do whatever it takes to feel good, letting go will be easy.

I don’t meant to be dramatic but every time you react to your negative thoughts, you are letting something good die. You are letting your positive thoughts get lost and might struggle to retrieve them. You are allowing your positive mood to wither while replacing it with the negative.

Choose the positive because attachment sucks.

Everything in life is your choice! What you accept is your choice. Stop accepting negative thoughts and start embracing the positive.

This is how you work with the Universe to bring your desires to life.

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41 Comments

  1. I understand that letting go is part of the process and genuinely feeling good helps raise your vibration which allows good things to come to you. I also started learning that part of “letting go” also means having no expectations because having expectations is a form of attachment. The reason why I am highlighting this is because often it is said that we should “happily anticipate” our desire to come–but that is expectation.

    I am currently reading the works of Neale Donald Walsch and he mentions often: “let go of all expectations, demands, or requirements”

    http://spiritlibrary.com/neale-donald-walsch/letting-go-of-expectation

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    1. To add to this, NDW says that expectation freezes the flow of energy because people often feel they are “spiritually entitled” to get their ‘stuff’. This is when expectation turns into requirement and that is the problem. Requirement is not necessary because a true master does not require what the master already has.

      It is like when you say that we should know that we already have our desires. You drop expectation by knowing that there’s no reason to expect what you already have.

      What NDW also mentions is that the way to know that you already have what you are seeking IS TO GIVE IT TO ANOTHER. Give what you wish for to another. Because when you give it to another you realize that you already have it. For instance, if you want more money–give money to others. If you want people to be more kind then be kind to others. I believe that is what he is saying.

      I wanted to share this because I think it is a “hidden gem” when it comes to the process of deliberate personal creation. It isn’t really explained explicitly.

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    2. Positive expectation that I am talking about means knowing that it’s all going to happen but never having specific expectations for specific moments. That would be too much work.

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  2. Nina,

    You’re right, attachment truly sucks. I try to remind myself that, and also that I’m worth more than to allow myself to sit in that state for too long. Usually a day is enough to explore the contrast and figure out what it’s here to show me, so I can move past it and keep leveling up in my vibration.

    I love this post, and you’re 100% right. Feeling good is how to make things happen.

    MY UNDERSTANDING OF LETTING GO THE EASIEST:

    Once I’m in a real and true state of feeling good, I’m able to “let go” easily and it feels natural. I find if I try to let go in a lousy emotional state I’m frantically trying to find out how to do it. But when I’m feeling genuinely great, I’m able to allow myself to let go in the proper and healthy way. A way that feels right and natural. It feels good to let go. So it almost seems pointless to try to let go unless I’m really feeling good. And I think that’s why it always goes back to feeling good.

    If you aren’t feeling good in your life, you’re most likely wasting a lot of time and energy on vision boards, affirmations and so on. The simplest, fastest and easiest way is to generate real joy, fun, and excitement in your life. I often have to redirect myself when I’m veering off in a more negative direction. And yes, it’s a choice. I remind myself that too. I can CHOOSE at any moment to think different thoughts, which in turn starts changing my emotions.

    The most aligned I am, the most responsive my reality becomes and the quickest I start to see my reality change is after I’ve been feeling amazing, and amazing about anything really! I can’t over emphasize this point enough. And let the Universe figure it out.

    Thank you Nina. Lots of love to you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Just a word of warning. I am extremely upset.

    I have not told anyone on here yet that I have for the last 3 months had a guy pursing me because I loved someone else, but I don’t even know why I love him anymore and I dont think I do.

    Someone please tell me WHY I have had a guy pursuing me for the last 3 months, who is 8 years younger than me, who i met out yesterday, who told me everything I have ever wanted to hear, who was getting text messages from his mother telling him how much she likes me and to go for the relationship with me, who has a mother who is fit, healthy, happy and in a happy marriage and they are well off and stable minded. Who told me he likes me alot and he is intrigued as to what I used to do for a job and told me I can be MYSELF!!

    And

    On the other hand WHY I have a fool, 10 years younger than me, who ignores me, talks to me when it suits him, is always too busy, cuts the phone conversations short, has to have everything on his terms, has reverted back to his old ways, says my name repeatedly when he picks up the phone out loud to let someone know he is on the phone with me in case his head combusts or something, you know?? Because apparently I am to be avoided and wouldn’t be good for his life!!! Ya know? Who has a grossly obese mother who convinced him that i am some kind of bad news, with a mother who text him disgusting things about me that none of it was true, with a mother saying all older women should be caught in dog traps, where they are all broke and struggling and all of them look all depressed with no happy relationships, all failed marriages, all failed relationships, nearly all single mothers, living in a suburb where my city makes fun of that suburb and he shook in my presence and ran for the door because he thought I was doing something psychic to him. And THIS is the people he takes advice from!!! Can you fucking believe that? This is who he had put his happiness into the hands of!

    LOOK AT THE CONTRAST!!! How can this be the law of attraction?

    How can one want to spend time with me and has a mother texting him telling him to go for the relationship with me and the other wont give me 10 minutes out of his entire life with a mother who texts him things to make him feel like he should be concerned?

    Can someone explain this please?

    How the hell – if it is MY vibration have I attracted 2 completely opposite people with 2 completely opposite mothers? HOW?? The new guy came into the picture 3 months ago so if my vibration really was that bad HOW DID I ATTRACT THIS AWESOME PERSON and how did I attract him when other areas of my life where all going to shit?

    How can it be resistance? I never met the fool who’s mother was texting him those lies when we were together. I have not met the other ones mother either, I’ve only seen photos!!!! Please explain to me WHYYYYY one was encouraging him to go for the relationship and the other one was telling him and making him feel like he should be worried? So ones mother is fit, happy, healthy and in a loving marriage, the other is obese, looks like she must have some kind of depression and is broke? HOW???

    Ill tell you why also! Because the the guy i liked – his mother is an unhappy, obese bitch in a shit marriage who robbed her kid of happiness because she cant be happy and he is a naïve loyal fool for believing her. I have the proof now. The new guy and his mum is enough proof for me to realise that the problem lay with the fool and his awful mum. The problem was not me or my vibration. The problem is that fool has psychological problems and an manipulative obese mother to match HIS vibration.

    I feel humiliated for even trying to pursue this. The fool told me from the start that he was not attracted to me. He told me that only a certain kind of person ‘makes it through’ and that he is very “picky” he’s been single for 6 years and guess what, he’s STILL adding the really young girls on his facebook. 16 year olds. He’s a mummies boy with psychological issues, he doesn’t want to grow up and he told me that. He pursues very young girls because he himself probably thinks he is still 16. There is only one way a boy becomes this fucked up and its to do with this mother. You only need to look at her comments about older women being caught in traps and her constant warning him of me. He has been told to not tell me anything, not to give me any information. I’ve had it.

    I removed him from facebook and blocked him on very device. I don’t deserve another day of this shit now that I have seen how it should be. Do you think he will notice I have gone? Hahahahahah! Of course not. I didn’t make it through from the start, thats why he ignored me for years. The day after he saw me when we had not seen each other for 8 months or so hes text stopped the text day. When I asked him what was the matter he said not to send him a fucking novel and that he was busy. I don’t deserve that. He put me through hell. I don’t deserve hell. I deserve what the new person has been saying to me.

    I don’t want to be with someone who cant even tell when he’s own mother is fucking up his life. It wont matter if it is me or someone else. She will ruin everything for him and like a good little fool he will stick by her because of guilt then you throw in his social conditioning and brainwashing into the mix and its a recipe for disaster. Those 2 are an abomination to each other. Then you throw in his obsession with looks, its an atom bomb. He called my dog fat. Nina, you have seen a photo of my dog. Is she fat? The answer is no. He has been made to believe that he cant cope without her and sometimes you meet people and sometimes you have to leave them where they are. She can have him. I deserve better than this and it isn’t going to come from someone who thinks they are a supermodel and that I was not good enough to make it through because of his social conditioning and living his life through the beliefs of people who couldn’t even look after themselves!! All mummies boys think they are supermodels. Of the mummies boys I have met, the friends, NONE OF THEM COULD HOLD A RELATIONSHIP DOWN because the nutter mother is in the background constantly warning them because these unhappy moles cant be on their own and cant be assed fixing their own marriages so they get the son to give them what they are not getting from the marriage.

    He will not come after me and he wont even know I am gone because he’s conditioning and his grossly obese mother wont allow him to love “someone like me.”

    I hope the best for you all. I dont need a response anymore. It’s done.

    4 YEARS.

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    1. WOW Gretta!

      I’m so sorry, and I’m going to tread carefully here being that you’re upset and I hope my words are encouraging but also honest from the outside of your box looking in.

      I think you’ve been moving forward with incredibly positive momentum since quite some time. You may have manifested guy #1 a long time ago to show you contrast. Meaning he was there to show you something. That’s all resistance is. And from everything you write and have written he really brings out a lot of contrast/resistance in you! That isn’t a bad thing. Because it’s quite possible he was here to help you reach the goal you ultimately want. Which I’m assuming is to be in a happy, healthy, loving, connected, spiritual union with an ideal match who fits you and only you.

      It looks to me like guy #2 has shown up because you’ve been positively moving forward for quite some time now. And my guess is around 3 months ago you were really starting to make some amazing shifts in your vibration. You were letting a lot of stuff go. You were releasing a crazy amount of resistance. And it’s been ongoing for you. With all this shit coming up and leaving you, you have opened yourself up to alignment and manifestation.

      From my understanding from Abraham, Law of Attraction will find the path of least resistance to make your desire or dream come true. If this guy is the path of least resistance, and things are matching up according to what you’ve been putting out there, chances are he may be a strong contender for you. Not to say he really is the ONE. But he might be.

      Maybe after your emotional dust has settled a bit, (go ahead and feel all the bad negative feelings that are coming up right now because you can more easily let them pass and move forward) be open to a new path, a new direction. Have fun with this, because I have to tell you this is f***ing amazing!!!
      And maybe that’s why you’re having a huge emotional response right now. Maybe this is another AHA moment for you. And also you’re seeing how damn valuable and special you are. Because to be in a position of feeling less than worthy because of someone else feels like crap. And it’s not in harmony with your highest good, and that’s why it feels so bad.

      If everything going on with guy #2 is matching up what you’re putting out there then my goodness give it a chance! Go have fun! Go spend your beautiful energy on another beautiful human being and see what kind of magic you can create together. Keep living, keep moving forward and keep expanding!

      What I see is the Universe responding to you, and what you’ve been positively putting out there. The fact that you’re responding in such an emotionally volatile way is a really good thing. The clarity after this is going to be breath taking at the very least. You’ve been doing so great, this is just another representation of your positive alignment. I’m so happy for you!!!

      Maybe not this moment, but you will be able to celebrate this and see it for what it really is. You creating your reality. Thank you for sharing this because you’ve helped me validate certain thoughts and feelings I’ve been experiencing myself the last 36 hours.

      Anyways, lots of love to you Gretta. I hope I was able to help at least a little bit.

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  4. JCE

    Thanks for the reply. I will have to read it again.

    For four years all he has ever been saying to me is that he doesn’t want me around. He’s made me feel like the ugliest person on the planet. I left once for 6 months or so once and he said ‘a miracle happened’

    When I was out with the new guy to find out what he wanted and he showed me those nice things his mum was saying in those text messages – FURY came over me. Fury at why him and his mum didn’t see me in the bad light that the fool does and his mum does.

    The new guys mum KNOWS i am older than him and doesn’t have a problem with it, but the fools one does. WHY is that? Why did the fool listen to his mother? Because hes a weak child and she is able to control and manipulate him and he sticks by her because of GUILT.

    Do you know what its like to be sitting across from someone who really likes you and all you can think about is a fool thats done nothing but break your heart for years? I must be a masochistic or something???

    Also when things were not good when this new person stepped in how exactly did I attract them with so many things going wrong? I dont get it, how did i attract someone else when i was not feeling happy? Was stressed about finding more work etc?

    I’m just a failure. I can never do anything right. I turned myself inside out for the that fool and here i am 4 years later still with nothing.

    I can guarantee he doesn’t even know I am gone and I can guarantee he doesn’t care either.

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  5. I wanted to add. Nothing has happened with the new person. I know what he wants but I won’t be going into it with him. I dont think its fair, just or right to get into a relationship with someone while I have this crap going on. I dont want to hurt anyone either and I might and I don’t want that. I said we can hang out and be friends. He knows, I have been upfront with him. I just don’t think i am in the right head space to get into something with anyone right now.
    I have not posted a post like above since February. I know I have changed a lot but hearing ‘Ive been told not to tell y ou anything and not to give you information” and here we are again. So I’ve given him what hes always wanted. I know you can attract just based on letting go completely but what I have seen of him in the last 4 years it WILL take a miracle because he only dates blonde models. I think everyone things I over exaggerated. Nope. Has a relationship with his mother similar to what a couple has and only dates certain kinds of people. Models and blondes. I know the LOA is about what you BELIEVE but right now I don’t believe in anything.

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  6. The store where I am now, the clothing store, has offered me full time work to work at all the stores across my city. Then another clothing store contacted me today asking to see me. I forgot about asking about both of these things and there they were.

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  7. Dear Gretta, I’m one of those silent readers here 🙂 have read your comments for quite some time now and somehow felt the need to write a few lines. In the past few months, you seem to have undergone a tremendous spiritual development. You really should be proud of this – you indeed are a manifesting machine 😉 However, with regard to your Ex – please forgive me if I might sound a bit too honest (am German, you know, they are usually pretty straightforward 🙂 ) – even if you are able to get him back (which you definitely would since you cannot attract this and not the other – there still seem to be quite a few resistances) – why on earth would you want someone back who let you down, did not stand by you, does not love you, is not trustworthy etc – I could go on for hours. Look, I do not know you personally and you have your reasons why you still love him. Even though he might date “models” or has a monster mum – where is your self-confidence? I am sure you are a very attractive and bright woman, so what the hell are you doing this to you? You can get him back, no doubt -but why do want such a man back? What do you expect from this relationship? Do you really believe you could trust him again 100% ? If someone dumps me for whatever reason, he would never ever get a 2nd chance, knowing there are plenty of lovely men outside who will treat you like a queen and not like a doormat – You certainly are beautiful (everybody is), you possess plenty of self-confidence and dignity – if you allow it.

    LoA works, it’s not magic. You can have him back, if you stop having resistances towards him. Couldn’t it be that your Higher Self might know best and sends you all kinds of goodies – jobs, men, lovely clothes, shoes!:) This other man might not be the “One” (wonder of the “One” exists at all) but universe shows you there are other candidates, better choices than the one you’re crying your eyes out. He’s not worth one tear you’ve cried for him. Please relax, take a deeeeeep breath, pamper yourself with whatever tickles your fancy – and when you feel ok, then just open up yourself and let your energies flow. There is so much more to life than being upset because of one simple man who will probably never grow up – it this really your future? Would you really want to spend the rest of your life with a baby boy?

    Only you know the answer, my friend.

    Much love from Frankfurt, Germany 🙂

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    1. Hi

      He’s not my ex. We have never been together. A lot of what you wrote is true. I don’t know why I am bothering you are right. Fuck them both. Birds of a feather flock together.

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    2. Dagmar / Nina.

      Why does everyone keep calling it resistance? I got that way in the angry post above ONLY when there is another bullshit theory about me that ‘someone has told him.’ Usually I am flying freaking high and acting as, other areas of my life are now fixed – but i am sick to death of hearing these bad things said about me. How can I have any resistance in the area of love now when this other person showed up in the picture and is saying the opposite? I dont think its resistance at all. I think its sheer frustration and anger at being judged by 2 people who should be focusing on fixing their own lives instead of rubbishing others.

      According to the LOA and everyone telling me so it is ME that is causing all this to happen.

      IS IT ME CAUSING IT TO HAPPEN OR AM I JUST DEALING WITH 2 VERY UNKIND PEOPLE? Which is it?

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    3. The resistance referred to means having negative feelings towards him, the present and the related factors. That is resistance because you are not allowing yourself to feel that what you want is yours but feel that what you don’t want is yours instead.
      However, resistance can also say that you don’t believe what you want is right for you. You might actually believe that you could have him but you’d end up unhappy.

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    4. Dagmar / Nina

      And why is it that I feel so powerful and attract the things I want from clothing to now jobs coming at me and even made a new friend (girl) who i went out to dinner with last night, but this situation with him I feel so POWERLESS?

      It must be me doing it. I am not blaming myself for the way he and his mother has been but it is really telling how i can attract the things I want with such speed and this I cant do anything right with it.

      WHY? Because it means something to me and the other stuff doesn’t?

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    5. Nina.

      I am sorry everyone for all the posts. I figure if i blow up on here when i need to its not as bad as what I used to be.

      Just one more thing…. I have mentioned 2 friends on here before, one that didn’t want to help herself and has now developed full blown anxiety disorder. Last night she contacted me asking me to help her because it is starting to affect her job. I see she wasn’t ready before – I get that, but again my question is WHY does she trust me and want my help yet he and his mother have seen me as someone who should be avoided? He was told I wouldn’t be emotionally good for his life – YET i have people contacting me asking me to help them and hugging me and crying when I left the store the other day to go to the cafe job. WHY is the contrast between everyone else and him and his mum so HUGE? I just need to know is it me or is it his mum and him? Someone has got to understand why i keep asking this question. Can anyone else not see this? They are the only ones that hold this opinion of me. Who is causing this between me and him? Is it me or is it them?

      I really need an answer to this. If the answer is me I will take responsibility for it, but my logical mind just cant get around why other people love me, trust me and ask me for help and these 2 have done nothing but make me out to be someone I am not. Is it him and his social conditioning and her and her need to control every aspect of his life or is it me that is doing this?

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    6. Hi Gretta. I know you are wanting Nina to answer your question, but I wanted to comment also. I do not think his attitude/behavior has anything to do with you. I think it is all him, his mother, his personality and living conditions. You have been doing everything you can to make yourself happier and your life more positive. Sometimes, people are just resistant to being cared about and seeing someone for who they really are. I say this because I am going through the same thing. My “ex” told me his head is messed up and he is too busy to talk to me. That really hurts me to hear but it has nothing to do with me. I have tried to show him I care and want to keep a connection with him. Sadly, that is not what he wants or it is not as important to him as it is to me. I will always care about him and think about him but I cannot continue trying to get him back. Sometimes, we just have to face the fact that things will not always go our way, especially when it comes to love and relationships.

      I so want to come here one day and read everyone’s success story, including mine. Until then, as Nina says, love yourself…love your life…and don’t be afraid to love others…

      ❤️❤️

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    7. Your beliefs of this being true are perpetuating your perception of it, no matter who started it. You don’t always know what they’re thinking either – many times, you’d assumed they were thinking a specific way and sometimes, it was true. But focusing on them instead of yourself just makes you feel worse.

      You believe that others see you as a good person but these people see you as someone who does everything wrong. You’re too attached to their opinion that you are making it impossible for yourself to use LoA and believe in what you want before it manifests. You’re preventing yourself from believing that it’s possible.

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  8. Hi All

    I’m sorry about what you’re going through Gretta!

    I need your advice. I come from a very dysfunctional home/family. I have a big problem with my parents. They are very judgemental, controlling and very angry people. The situation at home has worsened after I resigned from work to complete off my studies. My parents are actually suggesting that I go back to the same place where I wasn’t even allowed to take lunch breaks, let alone have weekends off. We had a massive verbal altercation tonight because they just want to control my every move. I wish that I could move out but I’m unemployed right now. I feel stuck. They just keep on ganging up on me and insist that I’m not well mannered because I speak my mind. I really am hurting cause I have no one to turn to, not even my siblings and the only person that understood me well and supported me through this ordeal dumped me. I feel so hurt because they have put me in a state of depression right now. I was doing fine this week after having been ill for the past two weeks. But I feel dead inside right now. My parents are super controlling to such an extent that they wanted to check my payslip every month and how I spent my money. I hate how they keep on lowering my vibration. They even went as far as cursing me, saying that I won’t go very far in life because “I don’t live life according to their terms”. I feel so alone and isolated*sobs*. I’m really trying my best to use the law of attraction to improve my life but this has really lowered my vibration and badly. How do I deal with this especially since I live still live with them. How do I go about blocking out such negativity while trying to manifest a relationship with my ex, a better and well paying job, good health and peace? How do I go about doing this?

    Nina, Gretta, JCE and everyone else, please help!

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    1. Jeanie,

      I’m so sorry. I’m not sure if what I can say will help you. But I will tell you how I would maybe go about your circumstances.

      It sounds like the best thing you can do is move out. If your situation right now doesn’t allow that, start putting it in your mind and heart that you want a new place to live. And that may come about in the least expected ways. The Universe comes up with solutions that our minds simply couldn’t conjure up!

      I don’t know if school is something you could put on hold just so you could get out of the negative physical space you’re in. But I would make moving out one of my top priorities.

      In the meantime, don’t underestimate the value of your own vibration, and how this will effect the version of the people in your life that you will get. I have gotten different and better versions of my family members just by changing what’s going on with me on the inside. Trust me, it works. If it was me, I would google and research LOA tips on how to improve relationships with loved ones. And at some point some of this may include forgiving them. I had to do that. I had to forgive my family members for the wrongs. (This started with a week long assignment from my coach to do daily anger releases. But after 4 days I got it all out.) But once I did, things really started to change for the better. It was amazing, and I now have great relationships with them.

      What I will say is that to get results means really making a strong determined effort on your part. Be so determined to find a solution to your life that you KNOW things are going to change for you. The more you love yourself, the more you will naturally find solutions, or the right information or an amazing book that’s exactly what you need will come along. Help the Universe to help you. Ask the U for help and wait for the response, you’ll get one in some way.

      I hope some of this helps. Don’t give up and have faith that things can get better because they most certainly can. If you have any other questions just ask. Lots of love to you. 🙂

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    2. Hello dear. I suggest starting from something tangible – find the things in life right now that make you feel better than being at home does. There must be a friend or two, an activity or coming to this blog even. Consider the fact that you already have people who think you are worthy and that this CAN give you the strength to pursue more.
      Then, consider the fact that you must feel good about your goals and simply not caring about what other people think. What if your parents could NOT hurt you, no matter what they said, because you feel good about your decisions? This would make them change their attitude towards you because you had changed your attitude towards yourself!
      I know that this might sound impossible right now but it is also the fastest way. All it takes is a decision and strength. Your opinion of your life is most important and no one else can make you do what you don’t want to do.
      Lots of love xx

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  9. Hi Jeanie.

    I think the first thing to focus on would be getting work and moving out. Parents are over rated. They dont know whats best and most of the time they just ruin their own kids life and cant even sort their own lives out. I would move as far away as possible from them. Others might be able to give you better advice but i wouldnt stay in an environment with people like that.

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    1. This advice is good because changing your direct environment will help. What kind of job would you want to have instead and what would your living costs be? What do you want in this case? You can have it.

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  10. Bea

    Thank you for your response. I keep asking the same question/s about if it is me or him because I honestly dont know.

    Nina has said to me in emails that the LOA is about what you believe you can have. I get that. I know you could visualize and see it how you want it to be and how you want the other person to be but I don’t freaking know anymore! I feel powerless! Believe they love you and float downstream, that is all that keeps going through my head.
    When I saw what the other persons mother was saying about me I got so angry and upset, even though it was nice and sweet i just keep thinking WHY can these 2 see I’m a good decent person and he cant? Why did he take advice from people that dont even look after their own bodies?

    You are right about people being resistant to being cared about. For example. When we were talking on the phone we were laughing and getting along. As soon as he senses this he cuts the phone call off and says he has to go! He can not let me in! Its like he can not allow for us to get along and be happy and he can not find out that we could be good together or happy. He cant allow for that to happen because then it would smash his illusion of how it should be and it goes against his social conditioning and then he would have to see and realize that his mother WAS wrong. I dont think he wants to face ANY of that. Talking, laughing, BOOM! cuts the call short gets all serious again and puts his foot down on me. It is like he gets fearful or has to be in constant control! Wont allow himself to find out that it can and will work so keeps me at a distance.

    I dont know what to do anymore. I get sick of people saying its resistance (no offense anyone) because i think it’s him who has the resistance not me. I bring up all that crap from the past only when i find out im on this merry-go-round of lets me in a bit, cuts me off, lets me in a bit, cuts me off. I must be doing that too then?

    He only responds to everyday things. Will not respond to anything that contains emotion or finding out how things are in his life.

    I really feel that he only added me to facebook to ‘shut me up.’ He had to text me something – he said he was sorry he couldn’t get through on my fb messenger, this was true there was a problem with my messenger – but he could have text from his mobile – but that means he would have to have unblocked me from his phone. Do you see what I am getting at? Why not just send the text from the phone if you couldn’t get through to me on messenger? So if I had not realized there was something wrong with my messenger and not text first do you think he would have text from the phone? probably not! This is all about CONTROL for him and we have spoken about this before.

    I think it would be best for me to just get on with life. When i went out with my new friend last night i had so much fun and didnt even think about me until she asked me if i had anyone special in my life. Usually i would tell people about him but this time I just said “kinda” 😦 😥

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  11. It is so easy to do what Nina says. I read parts of her book daily. Not in the mode of ‘trying to manifest’ just because I like to read it for other areas of my life also, but I just suck when it comes to this situation with him. Badly.

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    1. That’s very sweet of you and to add, focusing more on everything you have apart from him will detach you from him. Look how happy you are with the jobs and everything else! Just live in that and you’ll raise your vibration. When the thoughts of him come to you, just start to focus on something else consciously. I advise that a lot because it is a conscious change of focus. We can all do it, just have to want to. You know what I mean?

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  12. I totally agree Gretta!

    I want to move out so badly. They have really ruined my life in so many ways over the years and are very emotionally abusive. My older sister is making me feel bad about my suggestion to move out soon but I believe that it will be for the better. My parents just want to use us(their kids) to pay off their debts and support them which I feel is entirely wrong because it is their responsibility and roles as parents. I can’t wait to leave home honestly they don’t have my best interests at heart entirely. I want to add moving out to my affirmation list so that it happens soon. I really want to be far away from all of this negativity and live a life that I am destined for. A life with no limitations and impossibility. That’s my dream!

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    1. Thank you so very much Nina/Gretta and JCE and to the blog fam 😊 . I’m really honoured and grateful to be a part of this Nina. I have been to psychologists before and I was on anti depressants as well due my break up and the situation at home. None of that helped. But talking to you guys has made a world of difference to my life. I am now able to work well on my self esteem gradually and I’m more happier than I was before I joined this blog. Venting to your’ll is so therapeutic and I feel like you guys understand me better and will surely help me manifest all of my desires. Love you all and God bless you! ❤

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  13. **THE MOST IMPORTANT POST YOU WILL EVER READ FROM ME.**

    JCE / Nina & All

    Firstly, I am very sorry about all my posts, but now I see how necessary it was to become that upset and why and you will see also.

    I’VE FOUND IT! I have found THE EXACT MEMORY that is causing this to happen and causing my reactions and as vulnerable as I feel putting it up on here, if it helps anyone else one day then I’m willing to be vulnerable and share it.

    He isn’t the first person that this has happened with. This goes wayyyy back. I’ve felt this ugliness about me my entire life. That my face is just ugly and that one one could ever love me. I battle everyday with it and it is so deeply ingrained that i cant seem to shift it and I kept asking the universe please give me the memory so i can go in with EFT or something else and get this block out of my system or nothing is going to change for me ever, with him or anyone else and all the things i want in life are going to keep eluding me or eventually breaking down. That was about 3? days ago.

    Just then I was on FB and something in the corner caught my eye in the trending section, i clicked on it and was looking at the photos and saw a famous woman in one of them. I then went into google photos to look up more of the same person and I am just staring at her and then another person caught my eye. I googled her. I remember thinking how beautiful she was when she was younger and still is. So the photos came up and i am starting to have an emotional reaction and getting angry and have no idea why. This is the awesome part, how my mind/subconscious and asking the universe to uncover the exact moment i adopted this belief about myself came to light.

    Yes, so I have no idea why I am getting such a bad emotional reaction from these women’s photos, it’s still not registering and then I remember thinking “I hate these women!!” then for some reason I google another woman who is beautiful and the same thing happens and I cant work out WHY i am googling these beautiful women! A few minutes pass and I’m getting more and more upset and it feels like the EXACT SAME REACTION when he doesn’t answer me or pay attention or makes me feel like i am ugly and not good enough – this is when I know its got something to do with these women and him AND his mum and the ugly feeling – so they are all interlinked!! And it is coming from me, not him and why I cant get an emotional grip on this situation.

    These are the memories that came to mind after googling those women. The memory is this and here goes… There is actually 2 memories.

    Memory 1.
    I used to sit on my bed with my mum. She used to buy magazines like Vogue and all those that had supermodels in it. In those magazines were obviously very beautiful women. MODELS!!!! YOU are all gasping right now right? What do i always say about him? He only dates / is interested models!! Looking back every guy i had been with fancied himself as a model or did some kind of modelling in their teens. Every single one! OMG! She used to stare at these women and say how beautiful they were and show me and say “Look how beautiful she is!” I must have been sitting with her as a kid wondering why is she looking at those girls and not at me? So as I kid I am picking up there and then that everyone else is better than me and I am not good enough / not pretty enough. (I must work harder)

    Memory 2.
    I curled my hair, i learnt really young how to do it. I put on my best dress, it was so pretty, i remember it was 3 different colors and made myself look as pretty as possible. I went into her room and she was sleeping (she used to sleep during the day) I woke up her up gently and said “look mum, look how pretty I look!” I did not get the reaction I was hoping for. She started screaming at me. Not because I had woken her up, but because i had got dressed up again. I was obviously always trying to dress up to get her attention. (Wow. I feel like a little kid again, the memory of that day must be so deeply ingrained that it made me cry just remembering it. It hurts)

    So basically I have spent my entire life looking for outside confirmation that there is nothing wrong with me but because I am vibrating this “i am ugly’ vibration that is what i keep getting back, thats why i keep getting people telling me I am not their type. Thats why he has treated me the way he has and thats why there is an issue with the mother also. Can you see how it is all interlinked? I can.

    Now that I have the exact 2 memories I will be able to shift this once and for all. Although I had tried with pono and eft on the basic “I am not good enough” “i am not pretty enough” “I am ugly” it was not sticking. Its going to take for me to go into the memory of that day and speak to my younger self to shift it and possibly explain to her that her mother had no confidence issues also and thats why she was also looking at those magazines, possibly also wishing that she looked like that too.

    So there you have it. The exact memories. And I have the answer. It’s me, not him. Its my vibration that keeps causing this to happen. Those are the 2 memories that caused me to adopt the belief that I am not enough / not good enough / not pretty enough.

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    1. And there it is Gretta.

      I had a feeling you were going to have a break through from this. Your reaction was so intense, there was no way something wasn’t going to smack you in the face and tell you what the root cause of this is. As I mentioned in my previous comment, I believed you manifested him to show you something.

      Thank you for sharing such emotional memories. It’s amazing how our childhood experiences mold who we are or stay with us in many cases the rest of our lives. Unless you really dig deep to root them out and move past them.

      This process is a funny thing. And we’re often so ill equipped to handle how it all works. How our inner self/ the Universe communicates with us. My guess is now that you know the root cause of all this, some big things are going to happen for you. You’ve already moved so much crap out of your energy field.

      And being that you’ve been vibing so high now, there isn’t anymore tolerance for shit in your reality anymore. Meaning your energy states are so high, that whatever shit is still hanging around simply can’t stay in your reality anymore. You’re in too high of a state now. They can not share the same space anymore. Does what I’m saying make sense?

      Take time to give yourself a lot of credit Gretta. What you have accomplished lately has been epic, it’s been movement at such a fast rate that you’re living what’s called accelerated living. And as Bentihno Massaro says, “It’s not for the faint of heart”. It means your life will change at such a fast pace that you won’t help but maybe freak out because it’s all happening in a way that you may feel you can’t even keep up!

      That’s what I see from what you write and the energy I’m picking up from you. Be really really proud of yourself.

      I will share this quickly: As a child I used to stare in the mirror and repeat over and over how ugly I was. That no man will ever want to marry me, who would want me? Will anyone ever want me? And that stuck with me for so long. I’m 37 and it’s taken years for me to see my worth, my value, and that I’m lovable. And I’m so glad now that I’ve moved past almost all of that. There is probably 5% left in there that needs addressing. But life feels so much different now. Life is amazing now, and I love myself in a way I never did before.

      I can’t wait to see what will unfold for you now that you’ve had this realization. Lots of love to you Gretta, and I wish you peace.

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    2. Thanks JCE

      I forgot to mention in the post above that the women I suddenly started googling were the exact same women my mum was showing me in the magazines. I think that is an important part I accidentally left out. Spooky! Then I got the vivid image/memory of my mum showing me those women in the magazines. I remember looking at the magazines.

      One of the women was Brooke Shields when she was in the movie Blue Lagoon. Google it if you don’t know what she looked like back then. Blue eyes blondish hair. The other models were also blue eye and sandy colour hair. Another reason why I probably grew up rejecting looking European. So you can see how far this goes back, she was 14 in the movie, I would have been somewhere around 5. I know the memory of the dress was somewhere around 6. I’d say it was going on my entire life. They say we are living out our lives from the first 6 years of our life. All true.

      Just finding out the memory and writing about it here has made a shift. I noticed something changed immediately when looking in the mirror. I just wish that I had found this out before blocking him and reacting. Oh well. We have come back from worse things.

      I think its really important to remember that we are the attractors, people treat us based on how we feel about ourselves. I can see that now more than ever looking back in my life and relationships. I can see the mirror now more than ever.

      In regards to him, I no longer feel the need to call him “The Fool!” (haha) I feel kinda relaxed, its odd. It’s not that I don’t care. I do. It’s more like I don’t care when or if because i no longer need him to validate me. Make sense?

      I admit I looked in the mirror and thought, Christ! It aint that bad! I still haven’t done the EFT on it yet. I fell asleep after finding the memories because all the crying wiped me out. I will do it tonight.

      I have to laugh at how upset I got. It is pretty funny, but at the same time if it didn’t happen i wouldn’t have found the exact memories and I really do have HIM to thank for that. He has shown me more than a person i was with for years.

      Yay! Oh my goodness! I hope that is the last of it! I’ve worked on myself like a trooper! I think it is because all beliefs stem off that one ‘i am not enough’ – when you dont have confidence in yourself it affects all areas of life.

      x

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    3. Hi Gretta,

      It’s nice to see how you are looking inside yourself for answers. It is not always easy to think back to our childhood memories that deeply hurt us. This shows you are very strong mentally and want to improve yourself no matter what it takes to do so. It is as simple as fear that sometimes stops us and remain stagnant in our current reality.
      I think by the end, when we do manifest our desires we will all become confident, lovable and powerful people 🙂 🙂

      Although you have now worked out what was causing you all these negative feelings, I would like to point out one thing that you could probably consider. In your posts you show a lot of anger towards his mother. Can you not visualise her in a positive way and send her heart energy? If you think she is one of the reasons for his behaviour, may be instead of getting angry with her you should love her the way she is. Law of Attraction will bring you back lot of love from her. You get back what you give right. It is OK to feel anger at some point after all we have our logical brain working but its how we control our emotions that we have been learning using LoA.

      The fact that the other guy and his mother showed interest in you should make you happy, grateful and confident..I don’t know why you felt so negative about it. LoA gave you what you wanted, may be not from your guy and his mother exactly – anyway it is a big sign that it is working in your way. But as you said, this anger has helped you yet again – you have discovered the reasons for your negativity so LoA indeed works as your faith in it is unshakeable!

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    4. Hi N

      His mother has not been bothering me at all. It only came out as it was interlinked with the memories. My mum doing that to me, his mum doing that to me. It all coming back to my own beliefs. I only have moments of dragging his mum in when he upsets me also. I don’t think that will happen anymore as i can now see the connection with the mothers also. My mum rejected me, his mum rejected me. I could go on and on. But yeah. I had been visualizing her and I getting along.

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  14. Hi Gretta – it is morning over here and I should be working but I’m quickly replying to your comment. I understand that the guy with the nice mother is not your king of hearts – what I was trying to say was that universe sends you other candidates who might not be your favourite (close but no cigar) – but just to “prove” there are better alternatives than the one you still seem to love. Whatever you manifested, you did because you sent your wish – and then let it go, knowing it would come – and if not, life would still go on. If you can manifest jobs or promotions etc., you can manifest a lovely guy as well. Universe doesn’t care, as you know. It’s us human beings who differ between big and small, possible or impossible, yes or no.

    You seem to put too much pressure on yourself – and if you’re really convinced that things from the past are still haunting you, then now it’s the time to release them and say good-bye to them. Find your own way how to go about it, perhaps write everything down on a piece of paper and burn it etc. They should no longer be a part of your life – it’s over, so release those demons. They cannot hurt you anymore.

    There is nothing wrong with you or anyone else here writing her/his worries, problems, sorrows. It’s all fine, you are ok and perfect as you are. You are unique and special, please never forget this. I really am touched that you and some other girls share their deepest thoughts here and I do hope, that you will find a way to release your anger and frustration towards this guy (the one with the fat mum 🙂 ) forgive him – and let him go. And move on with your life. Bea is right when she said there are people who just don’t want to be “rescued” – for him, his life might seem ok as it currently is, even if you think it’s not. But it’s his problem and maybe one day he’ll realise this – or maybe not. It’s his life.

    Shame that we live so far away – would really be nice to meet you, Nina of course! and the others in person to talk, laugh, maybe cry (a bit) We all had a our fair share when it comes to relationships, parents (like Jeanie), health or many other topics. Take the pressure off of you, leave the past behind you and live the life you want to live, although it’s not yet visible in your reality. Changes may not always happen over night and there will be moments when you think nothing is working for you – but it is. Believe. You know it.

    Lots of love to you xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Hi Dagmar

    Thanks for the response. Everything that happens to us is a product of how we feel and think about ourselves. I attracted this situation based on my vibration. Ive seen him be nasty to me and I have seen him be nice and all of it was dependent on how I WAS vibrating at that time.

    I could go on and on but I don’t really want to get into it. I don’t care that he is close to his mum – what was making me call them both names was that little hurt kid in me that was made to think i am not good enough so my natural response was to lash out at them.

    Everything that is happening to us, every time we perceive these guys are not treating us right, it is because of us. Not them.

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  16. Everyone,

    This is so great. To be a part of a community like this where we can support and help each other out is amazing and I’m so grateful for all of you! It’s a gift to be a part of this. I’m so grateful for this journey, and I’m grateful for my specific person because he’s shown me so much. He’s changed me for the better, despite the ups and downs over the last 2 and a half years and the times I cursed the day I met him. But oh what a gift all this personal growth and enlightenment has been.

    Before I head to bed I wish you all so much success in your growth, and the unfolding of your dreams. It’s possible for all of us, I know it. To live the best version possible of our desires. Happy dreams you guys!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Nina

    I read all your responses to me and as usual you are right. It is and has been my vibration that has been causing all the things in my life to go wrong. What else was I going to attract really when I was vibrating at such a low level of feeling for myself? No wonder nothing was going right.

    I don’t know if you read the big post above about the memories I found and how I was getting the exact same reactions looking at those women that I was with him – but either way I am feeling a lot lighter now. I can feel its shifted from me and I haven’t even done EFT on it as yet. I probably will just to make sure, but I am sure it has gone because I’ve looked in the mirror a few times since and that voice has gone. I also had this bizarre feeling going on all the time where i felt like my head was huge, obviously it is not, but that belief in me was making me ‘feel’ things that were not there and distorting my perception. You can see that something big was about to happen to me because on another post I had asked you personally if you had ever suffered from low self esteem. I was getting sick of how i was feeling about myself and it was only a matter of exploding AGAIN to find the memory of when I adopted the belief that i am not enough (as i am) As much as i feel humiliated to type out that first big angry post I’m glad i did. I shouldn’t apologize for it either.

    I dont care if anyone thinks I am crazy. I won’t be giving up, but i will be becoming a lot more active and doing what you said which is ‘- When the thoughts of him come to you, just start to focus on something else consciously.’

    As i mentioned the clothing store where i am still at one day a week is going to be putting me on as fulltime floater which means I will be going to all the different stores and they have told me that they think that i could manage one of the stores on my own – so if an opportunity comes up they are going to offer it to me. There is also a possibility that i maybe able to go full time at the store I am now at the end of the year but it isn’t confirmed, either way good news because i never really wanted to leave.

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