We like to imagine ourselves having what we want but we also like to think about who we are.
Everyone has a Law of Attraction block to overcome at one point or another. To some, this is distrust in the process; to others, it’s a lack of faith in their abilities. To others, it’s focusing on the current reality and being so upset about it that it prevents them from thinking about the ideal. To me, this was forgiveness.
At some point in my life, I became very unforgiving. I had created an idea in my mind that those who deserve me simply don’t make a certain kind of mistakes one should never make in a friendship or a relationship and if they did, I would discard them and move on (in most cases).
And then, I realized that I simply didn’t think these people were worth forgiving and I didn’t truly want them in my life. That moment, I knew that I would someday choose a partner who was too good of a person to make the deal-breaker type mistakes but still wondered how I would react if they committed less serious errors out of poor momentary judgement.
I started looking around and realized that most of those close to me occasionally committed these casual errors already. When I observed my reactions to those errors, they were usually harsh and, as if the person had forever let me down, resulted in a deep change in perception I had of this person. Even when I knew these errors didn’t mean that the person who committed them was entirely wrong about everything, I still held them to poor esteem simply because I didn’t want to forgive, thinking that their casual error never should have happened and that their judgement simply never should have been so off.
And then, I realized that if I never forgave even the smallest errors, those unintentional, casual and forgivable mistakes, I would never keep anyone in my life. I needed to stop being so upset and unforgiving of others’ mistakes, and focus on the people who were actually worth forgiving.
Focusing on why the person is worth forgiving and on who they are was the key. If someone simply needs to think a little more before acting because their spontaneous reactions hurt you, bring it to their attention or simply visualize them treating you with all the attentiveness you wish to receive (and then believe they will – simply choose to believe in them!). Focus on what they did right and magically, they will start making all the right moves very soon. However, if you continue to be upset with them, they will keep making the moves you dislike. Feeling good about someone now ensures their more than positive displays towards you in the near future.