Whatever our needs are, we should consider them small; if we consider our needs massive, there’s a chance that we’ll begin to fear never meeting them and finding them elusive.
I used to attract out of need…but not in the way it sounds.
I would have a need to be in a relationship, manifest one and then, after my need was fulfilled, I would move on to my next momentary need (which was usually travel).
During this phase, I was thinking short term. I hadn’t thought about the things I permanently loved. I was living for the experiences rather than love.
And do you know when I realized that living for experiences meant acting out of need in my case?
When I realized I was more focused on not being bored than enjoying my life. I was focused on not experiencing what I feared instead of experiencing what I loved.
For as long as this phase lasted, I was all about keeping my life interesting. And then, I realized I could make it interesting no matter what I loved to do, even if it wasn’t something I ever imagined loving or enjoying in the past. So, this phase brought on something great. It brought answers. It brought me to the core of my passions and made me see what it was all about.
Love for what we do is enough to make the thing in question interesting for ourselves. When we accept what we love and accept that it can bring us an interesting life, we achieve blissfully relaxed awareness. What if tomorrow, I decided to become a mother when I couldn’t see myself ever doing so in the past? I would enjoy everything it entailed. What if I decided to completely turn my lifestyle around and become someone I never thought I wanted to be? If it was something that truly made me happy, I would enjoy it very much.
It’s not what you do – it’s how much you value it. And if you do, and stand by your choice, you will enjoy it and you will make it interesting. Which is great because in order to attract it into your life, you must be able to see it being yours – and what we enjoy, we can see ourselves having.
There was an interesting period in my life when I wanted to change but didn’t know who the new me wanted to be.
Equally, I didn’t know who I wanted the new me to be.
That’s what makes us lonely – not knowing who we are. And when we attach an idea of who we are to another person, a lover or a specific person we want to manifest a relationship with, we feel lonely without them.
We need them.
We falsely worry that our life would be empty without them.
You might be familiar with this situation – you want to attract a relationship with a specific person only to find yourself diving into negative thoughts instead of planning the relationship you say you want to have.
First of all, engaging in negative thoughts is always a choice – they can come unexpectedly but we either choose to engage in love or fear. Many of us have engaged in both at different times in our lives. At any moment, we have the power to change our thoughts to positive so when you notice yourself in an upsetting thought process, choose belief instead!
Choosing belief goes a long way in manifesting love because by engaging in the thoughts of having what you want already, you are consciously choosing to see the best in the person you love and emit the loving energy you wish to receive. The loving visualizations and energy you emit are your own personal communication of what you wish to receive.
Do you wish to attract a commodity, circumstance or a relationship you believe would change your entire life and bring you happiness almost magically? In your mind, is this particular desire the Holy Grail of your goals and personal fulfilment?
If that’s the case, you might find the impression of your desire being present or absent controlling your overall mood. The appearance of short-term manifestations or signs that make your ultimate desire feel real inevitably lift your spirits while negative signs or the feeling of loneliness can just as easily take over, giving you a sinking feeling. Even if you don’t want to feel the absence, you often end up feeling too weak to help yourself.
What is there to do?
If you are, it might be the reason you keep getting stuck, manifesting the same situations over and over again, without knowing how to break free and manifest what you want for a change.
Is shame the manifesting block you have been trying to pinpoint and overcome? If so, you are now on your way out of the darkness.
Being ashamed of something you’ve done or experienced is just another version of feeling as if you are not good enough; it is the fear of inadequacy that makes you doubt your own worth, power or ability to make life happen. That sense of shame can be strong enough to effortlessly keep you focused on your perceived mistakes instead of enjoying the visualizations of the life you want, making you feel like you don’t deserve that life because of the embarrassment endured.
Take your focus off “How long will it take to manifest?” and switch it to living life now!
If you’re waiting, you aren’t living life…and that is a mistake because life is worth living. You just have to find your inspiration and make it beautiful.
Do you have a problem feeling good about yourself no matter what you have or, don’t?
Is this you?
- When you think thoughts of having your desire, you always end up back in the same old negative place after a little while.
- Your fears keep coming back even when the current reality starts to turn into everything you have asked for.
- You always assume that things will go wrong at some point.
- No matter what you do or how much you manifest, you just don’t feel “right.”
There is a difference between feeling good about having your desire and feeling good about yourself.
If you don’t feel good about you, you run the risk of manifesting your desire but not keeping it in your life. Feeling poorly about yourself can prevent you from seeing yourself living your desire permanently, even if you can see yourself receiving it initially.
Let’s face it – self work is the part many attempt to skip, pushing themselves to believe their desire belongs to them instead of repeating affirmations about themselves in addition to their desire.
And why is that part important?
You are supposed to feel good about both yourself and your desire. If you don’t feel good about yourself without your desire, you won’t even after it manifests. This is the biggest reason your desire cannot fix your life or your awareness – only you can do that!
Many also attempt to skip over the self-work part due to the impatience to manifest their desire as soon as possible. However, they continue to feel poorly, blaming the lack of their desire for this state of mind when in reality, the state of mind itself is the problem.
Your decisions about your life come first. Your awareness comes first and your thoughts second. This is why you can face your negative thoughts and say, “No! I asked for what I want and that is what I must receive.”
You must start to rely on your conscious decisions and insist on them instead of your uninvited negative thoughts. This is the reason why you can say, “I asked for my desire and that is what I must receive.”
You can ignore those negative thoughts because only you consciously decide who you are and how you live your life. You decide what makes you happy. By ignoring these thoughts and saying yes to your conscious decisions and nothing else (or, less), you are respecting yourself. You are only accepting what you want.
What to do…?
After coming to realize that your awareness and conscious decisions come first and your thoughts second, you are to focus on every bit of positivity you feel about yourself. You are to tell yourself why you deserve your desire.
Then, you are to start to finally be happy without your desire. When you have a problem being happy, you are advised to examine why instead of think about your desire.
Are you trying to tell yourself that you want something but ignoring your true nature and needs in reality? You need to face those first.
If you know that there is a part of you which is unhappy no matter what, ask yourself why. Ask yourself what it is you honestly want.
If you want something that you don’t want to want, admit that you want it any way. At least in part, admit to yourself that you might want other things than your desire, even only occasionally. After facing those thoughts, you will get to know yourself and you might just change your mind, realizing your desire is enough after all.
Never chase the idea of living a specific life but think about the kind of life that makes you truly happy. If you want to manifest something just for show or just to prove your power to yourself, it’s not worth it. To manifest, you must feel good and if you are simply trying to fulfil your needs, you are not feeling good.
It is time to focus on living your life instead.
What is it that makes you happy? Do it. Put yourself first, not your desire. Putting yourself first equals feeling good so if you must resolve your lack of happiness with yourself and admit to yourself why it is there, do it.
Be important enough to yourself to do whatever it takes to make yourself feel better, even when it takes profound self honesty. Face yourself and remember that no matter what you find, you are worthy of love and can start to give it.
When you feel desperation for your manifestation to happen and the need to have it because you don’t just yet, all you see is emptiness from the direction of your desire. You develop borderline paranoia because you are governed by need, not love.
This is why you must ask for your desire, love it and assume it is yours already – nothing less, nothing else.
Imagine you want to manifest your dream job. You applied for it but got no results. You continue to wait. You keep drowning in the reasons why the job might not be yours. You tried to control the process in your mind by attempting to figure out how your dream job should manifest if it were to truly be yours but that just makes you feel like your desire is slipping away.
You might also be manifesting something you feel badly about but keep trying to feel good about it instead of just feeling good. If you have negative beliefs about your desire, you know that you need to resolve them or decide they’re false and ignore them; either way, engaging in the need to escape them will prolong that state of neediness.
You must realize whether you are currently governed by need or love – which of those two has taken over your awareness?
I have occasionally wondered if the human need for love always means the need for love first and love from a specific person second. I sometimes think that even when projected on a specific person, the need to manifest a relationship with them comes from the overall need for love, the hurt from loneliness or something similar.
If a relationship is what you desire, give love to yourself first. A myriad of reasons why self-love melts away all manifestation roadblocks continues here.