I want you to have the desire to get your life exactly where you deserve for it to be. Continue reading “Your Life is Too Important to Not Manifest Your Dreams”
Men and women are often being told that showing interest in a prospective partner makes them look needy, desperate or pushy, and that those who don’t care are the ones who get the girl/guy instead.
Those giving and taking or worrying about such advice take an important ingredient out of it – the Law of Attraction which says that your beliefs and intentions translate into who you are, meaning that only what you see possible for yourself can manifest into your reality.
Only those open to relationships can actually find themselves in one. What we believe is possible for us is what we’re open to in our lives. If we believe that something else is impossible for us on the other hand, we are automatically closed off to receiving it.
If you find something impossible, how can you be open to it happening? Belief is what creates the openness to receiving.
Those who seem not to care about relationships are not indifferent to them – they only see relationships as something normal, natural and possible for themselves therefore they don’t need to worry about them.
If you’re open to relationships, you easily see yourselves in them. If you want to become open to them, you will affirm gratitude, look forward to them and believe in yourself while knowing that love is meant for you, sticking to this attitude until manifestation occurs.
If you’re closed off to people, saying there are no good ones out there, you are not open to believing that love is possible therefore love cannot appear in your life. You’re the one blocking its way in. You’re the one keeping it out.
If you are closed off to relationships, you obviously believe they’re not possible for you, finding yourself single as a result.
You must look forward to relationships and actually like people, especially the one you fancy, to manifest a loving relationship with them. Focusing on your specific person’s faults and a lack of faith or fear will close you off to receiving love, as fear and love cannot coexist.
I had gone through a phase in my life when I didn’t like anyone. I was completely closed off from appreciating the male gender. Whoever was interested, I immediately knew I wasn’t at first glance, effectively killing their interest as a result. I was being asked why I didn’t have a boyfriend and knew the answer all too well.
The truth is that I genuinely didn’t want to be with anyone that moment. However, I didn’t expect them to want to be with me either after sensing my lack of interest. I advised my friends to actually show interest in their own specific people – having realized that the best way to spark someone’s interest is to show your own interest in them, I was aware that happiness and openness are magnetic qualities that attract other people into our lives. This is what boosts your magnetism. Happiness and true confidence prompt openness to others which is very attractive to all while a closed off mindset attracts no one except maybe those who think they don’t deserve any better. People who advise being careful and closed off are effectively telling you how to kill your own attractiveness.
Now, being careful has nothing to do with boundaries; in fact, creating personal boundaries has everything to do with self-love, self-confidence and a personal sense of value. You know what you deserve and the more self-love you engage in, the more you believe you deserve. And, you do because you give as much as you know you deserve. You respect others and demand the same in return. This is a concept many tend to mistake for being closed off.
If you love yourself, you love and see the best in others. You also begin to immediately distinguish those worth your time from others that aren’t; you can tell apart a heart driven individual from one that isn’t so.
Now, the following is what makes the world of difference.
When you are a heart-driven individual yourself, you become attracted to those with their own sense of self-love, confidence, strong personal identity, focus and value. Yet if you live your life fearing disappointment, brooding on your past perceptions of failure or expecting the worst from your desired person and relationship, you will attract the behaviour or the people you will find it difficult to believe in and feel good about.
If you want to be with someone, you must believe in them whether you met them yesterday or share a painful past together.
Those you share a painful past with will treat you differently once you treat yourself differently.
Everyone will treat you the way you treat yourself and come to value you as much as you value yourself sooner or later.
Happy and confident interest in someone spells out quality. They will admire and be attracted to you as a result.
If you care about a specific person, enjoy talking to them. Don’t think about anything you are not “getting” from them. Visualize them happily being in your life and appreciate them even if you don’t vocalize it – that invisible energy is what attracts someone to you, whether or not you speak to them. This is LoA.
But if you do, speak to them with interest and positivity. Appreciate them and value yourself.
I suggest you celebrate yourself and your life.
You have to play the lead role in your own reality instead of putting the person you want to manifest a relationship with first. You can prioritize them but imagine the relationship and your love as you want it and as it makes you happy!
I mean, being able to love someone the way you want to and have them love you back…don’t you love the thought of that?
Don’t you want that?
Should I start referring to myself as a “positivity coach?” “Life and positivity coach?” I don’t know yet but I’ve been playing around with that term today.
A client of mine recently introduced me to the following quote:
“A person who truly loves you will never stop believing in you and will never let you go, no matter how hard the situation is.” (Courtesy of powerofpositivity.com) My client then asked me to elaborate on this quote and gave me plenty of ideas through which to explain it.
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This quote refers to several things and several stages of a relationship (or a relationship manifestation). To me, it means the following.
When it comes to manifestation, you might be closer to your goal than you realize.
You might think you have no money only to discover that your bank account balance increased while you weren’t looking.
You might deem it impossible to imagine living the life you want only to find yourself indulging in related visualizations soon after and coming out a different, more positive person.
A simple change in your daily dynamics could help you realize how far you’ve come and what a positive person you genuinely are.
You might fear you will never attract the person you want to be with (back) into your life only to finally let go as a result, shift your awareness entirely and all of a sudden, manifest.
Some could say I don’t have much experience when it comes to forgiveness. After all, I have forgiven but often refused second chances to others, a choice that can be misinterpreted as a lack of forgiveness. However, I find the practice of forgiving someone I don’t want in my life but keeping them away at the same time completely legitimate.
When it comes to LoA, forgiveness is essential. Essentially when it comes to dealing and manifesting new relationships with your exes.
Forgiveness is a choice. Once you make it, stick to it; otherwise, why bother?
Here’s a little explanation from my past of what it means to make a choice. And forgiveness is a choice just like any other.
WHY I LOSE INTEREST
I had eventually lost interest in every relationship I was in. I’m trying to think about what exactly this means.
Losing interest was my personal epidemic. People have told me it is because I don’t fall in love easily.
In the past, I fell in love but didn’t stay in love. Falling in love was based on focusing on the good in the man I was with until finding out something that changed my perception of him. I have been in love before but I’ve never been with a man and thought, “He’s the one.” Even when I thought I thought it, I knew I actually didn’t.
As far as LoA was concerned, I got what I had asked for. I was only comfortable loving while love lasted without effort, only for as long as I was interested in his positive traits. I guess I never considered any of those men someone I’d be proud to call my partner in the long run.
I did not need any of my chosen partners to be classically good looking, rich or anything else that was physical or material – I only wanted to see something in a man that was different. Special. I didn’t ask for anything but positive and caring personality, manners and a man who created a life for himself he genuinely enjoyed.
Once, my then-boyfriend sat on the only free bar stool while we were out with friends, without even offering it to me first and leaving me standing while he sat down without blinking. I was embarrassed. Not about what others might think, especially since most didn’t give the situation a second thought, but embarrassed with myself for having been in a relationship with an idiot. When the same then-boyfriend and I were walking in the street one day, he suddenly disappeared without a word because he saw someone he knew across the street and ran to say hello without giving me a heads up. I walked for another two seconds before realizing I was walking on my own. In my mind, he instantly became an unequivocal idiot.
The sad thing is, I have even “better” stories from this particular relationship. And by sad, I mean tragicomic. What I actually mean is hilarious.
To be fair, this was in my early to mid-twenties and taught me that someone being “a good guy” was just not enough. I used to say I liked “good guys” and thought that one being “good” or “nice” was enough. I had completely ignored my taste for basic sophistication, personality wise. That kind of sophistication requires self-comfort, confidence and an open heart. Heart driven individuals have it while those driven by insecurity block their own sense of self love. I like good men but I also like quality men and goodness is just one, possibly the core but still not the only trait of overall quality.
This relationship was a lesson in quality. Manners don’t take wealthy or privileged background but only a little intelligence and common sense. A lack thereof could have come from one’s old, negative habits with less-than-quality women (or maybe I acted like one in part, who knows). Maybe it had something to do with low quality upbringing but eventually, we have to reevaluate the “values” we were raised on and create our own.
Again, I was younger then (I turn thirty two on January 5th) but these incidents were enough for me to stop respecting my then-boyfriend.
Now, what did LoA bring me as a result of this?
When one stop respecting another, they set the relationship up for a free fall. I started to keep him around as I pleased, felt free to start arguments as I pleased without worrying if raising my voice when I did would hurt his feelings. Later on, leaving him caused growth in my self-respect; it wasn’t difficult for me to do because I already loved myself enough to put myself first and know that everything was going to be okay.
A LESSON IN FORGIVENESS
I’ve been asked how to forgive. Some might argue that I don’t have much experience with forgiveness but as much as I believe one can talk their relationship issues out lovingly, especially if they genuinely love the person in question, I didn’t want to in this case. Others might say I’m too critical but I’m not perfect, just like anyone else – I am however fair and devoid of hypocrisy, as I only stay put for as long as I want to, never fake or pretend and am always honest. When I give something a chance, I mean it. When I’m unhappy, I leave. Living this honest life is the only way I can be happy.
I make decisions according to my feelings and personal values.
You can however choose to love and forgive your (desired) significant others for absolutely anything. You can choose to love them despite their faults but it must be a decision you will stick to.
You must forgive and stick to it the way I chose to leave and stuck to it.
You might wonder how to forgive and the answer is, by being strong. It takes strength to stay and it takes strength to leave, your relationship or any other manifestation you want to bring about.
If you want to forgive yourself and everyone in your past, appreciating the lessons you learned, do it. You are allowed to forgive and move away from the individuals who do nothing to contribute to your happiness.
If you decide to forgive someone you still want in your life, look at it as starting over. Create the new present and forget the past. Be strong enough to do that.
When you love the manifestation period preceding your desire, you receive it fast; you’re probably aware of this already.
Let me explain.
Every single time you manifested something without the need to rush it, it came to you fast. Sometimes, this desire appeared in your life instantly.
This can happen with desires one perceives as “small” or “likely to have.” However, those perceived as “life changing” cause resistance, fear, uncertainty and doubt many use to give up on them. If unfamiliar with creation principles, unaware of LoA or not used to consciously creating, one might automatically shut down the flow of positive energy upon the appearance of those thoughts. One might feel all sorts of doubt and anxiety lowering their vibration.
When attaching profoundly positive feelings to your desire, no matter how big or small you’ve perceived it to be, that desire becomes a natural course of events in your mind. You know it’s coming. You know it’s yours already.
MANIFESTATIONS NOW AND THEN
I used to create intricate manifestation stories in certain areas of my life instead of allowing them to come to life easily because I perceived that easy path as boring. When manifesting my past relationships, I wanted to make all the first moves and then, enjoy what I created. Many wish they didn’t have to make an effort with relationships and I thrived on “making it happen.” I would create work where there wasn’t any because a great story of a relationship coming to life had to be present.
In addition, I thrived on showing others they could make anything happen and being assertive about everything I desired was the way to go. I was comfortable with taking action and over time, I realized the following.
Projecting the right energy was an action in itself. In truth, one doesn’t have to do anything in order to receive their desire – some do nothing and receive and others do everything without seeing change.
Manifesting money has always gone interestingly in my life. I continuously receive double the expected for any amount when shopping, as the items I desire seem to be on sale most of the time. I have often received gifts and beauty treatments. I have unexpectedly found money in the past. I went on all-expenses-paid trips. When envisioning my last professional fee, I received double the amount.
I also enjoy giving, donating and treating my loved ones greatly. I love to pay for dinner, concert tickets, groceries, drinks, gas (when someone else is driving) or cab rides, donating money to charities and give gifts. I donate clothes on a regular basis, all in fantastic condition. Others also enjoy treating me to dinner, drinks or entertainment. Positive feelings are attached to money in my world.
There was a time in my life when I was unsure if budgeting could bring me positive results but wanted to try it anyway. It was one of the least fruitful decisions I’d ever made. Budgeting created momentary money limitations in my mind, which would lead to generally having less, not more. I needed to change those beliefs once again but learned several valuable lessons along the way.
When manifesting work engagements, I quickly discovered my likes and dislikes. Before deciding on what I truly wanted to do, I tried out a variety of jobs. I was interested in life and wanted as many different experiences as I was willing to dedicate my time to. Twice in my life, I gave sending out my CV to apply for jobs a try and hated it with passion each time (even when it would lead to employment).
My preferred method rested in the expectation that others would seek me out for professional engagements and, they did. I would decide what I wanted to do, as detailed as I could, and know it was mine.
I believe it was so due to a simple creation principle – that which perpetuates the lack of our desire makes us miserable and creates more of the same.
To me, sending out my CV only made me feel like I was searching for a job instead of having it. I felt this practice lowering my personal standards. I am much happier asking for my perfect gig and letting it go, inevitably leading to manifestation. This hasn’t changed but my relationship manifestations have.
Your intention is what matters. To some, CV sending perpetuates the feeling of looking for a job. To others, it is a highly positive practice that will lead to their ideal job. You may either alter your perception or your practice in order to change your awareness.
An additional factor involved in this idea was my knowing I would return to writing as soon as I was ready.
Over time, I discovered the appeal of relationships, observed my old mistakes without emotion and reassessed my true desires.
There was a time I held mostly negative views of relationships but learned it was so because I wasn’t entirely basing them on pure love. However, I would also always preset their expiration date (instead of allowing them to take their natural course, whatever that might have been). Holding negative views on relationships was fueled by my belief that I was meeting and dating men who could simply never be enough for me. I started to wonder about what I was missing and therefore wanted.
Relationships can be pure bliss, with energy clear, loving feelings prevailing and problems easily solved. When problems appear, many see them as the end of the world, lowering their vibration and causing more problems. When good times come, one may either be grateful for their abundance and lasting bliss or expect them to fade any minute because “good things don’t last.” Either way, their awareness will determine the continuation or the halt of bliss in their lives.
When manifesting relationships today, I ask for my desire and automatically know it’s mine. I visualize everything I want the relationship to be. I visualize everything I want us to be and live. I live it before we do together – I feel what it’s like to have it. There is usually one visualization I repeat more than others – spontaneously created, emotion-filled, a favorite. This particular visualization reflects everything I want to be, the adoration I feel for my man and the relationship I want to live. Sometimes, I only have to do it once before the relationship appears.
The reason for manifesting a specific relationship should rest in nothing but love for the person you want to be with. Some relationships, I manifested because I saw the man I had my eye on as an amazing person who would be an exceptional boyfriend. Others, I manifested when simply wanting the experience of being with a specific man.
I am tempted to add the following passage to every single post I ever write from now on.
KNOWING that your desire is yours brings inner peace and removes the need for signs. Knowing your desire is yours already boosts the feeling of love for your manifestation period. If you discover that having your desire doesn’t make you feel good, this is an entirely separate issue from the feeling of not having it in your life; you must feel good about having your desire in your life.
If you don’t KNOW it’s YOURS, no amount of signs is going to help.
How can you know?
Because your desire belongs to you the moment you ask for it. The Universe creates the very moment we ask. Then, allowing your desire to come into your reality is the only thing left.
Does having every desire in your life make you feel good? It didn’t always make me feel good, especially with relationships. Seeing myself with several specific men was only tempting in theory while in reality, I had to admit to myself that I didn’t truly want them. Wanting to care about someone didn’t mean I automatically would.
As one of my close friends once said, “I know you tried to want that relationship but if you don’t, you don’t.” Obviously, the “trying” to want it only leads to more trying and unless I was willing to alter my beliefs, the time had come to move on.
When manifesting anything, one would go wrong seeing it as following the steps and manifesting their desire. Are you aware of having your desire or currently manifesting it? From moment one, be aware that your desire is yours already and follow the steps without overthinking them. Observe your thoughts emotionlessly. Don’t think about the steps as you’re making them and how correct they are while looking out for your desire to appear at the same time. That is not having; it is manifesting which will lead to more manifesting.
From the moment of asking for your desire, assume that it is yours without waiting for it to appear. Complete manifestation steps as you feel that your desire is yours already while also feeling gratitude for having it in your life. This knowing will make your manifestation period a happy one, not to mention the necessity of knowing that your desire is yours before being able to receive it.
Getting what I give has never been a problem. Would you like to do the same?
Make doing what makes you happy your priority. Those who do receive everything they want from the Universe, as if they never had to seek it out. When doing what makes you happy becomes your only action taken in life, you need for nothing and see everything you want practically handed to you.