Not Giving Up on Them – What Does it Mean?

Not Giving Up on Them – What Does it Mean?

Should I start referring to myself as a “positivity coach?” “Life and positivity coach?” I don’t know yet but I’ve been playing around with that term today.

A client of mine recently introduced me to the following quote:

“A person who truly loves you will never stop believing in you and will never let you go, no matter how hard the situation is.” (Courtesy of powerofpositivity.com) My client then asked me to elaborate on this quote and gave me plenty of ideas through which to explain it.

This quote refers to several things and several stages of a relationship (or a relationship manifestation). To me, it means the following.

Continue reading “Not Giving Up on Them – What Does it Mean?”

The Meaning of Forgiveness

The Meaning of Forgiveness

Some could say I don’t have much experience when it comes to forgiveness. After all, I have forgiven but often refused second chances to others, a choice that can be misinterpreted as a lack of forgiveness. However, I find the practice of forgiving someone I don’t want in my life but keeping them away at the same time completely legitimate.

When it comes to LoA, forgiveness is essential. Essentially when it comes to dealing and manifesting new relationships with your exes. 

Forgiveness is a choice. Once you make it, stick to it; otherwise, why bother?

Here’s a little explanation from my past of what it means to make a choice. And forgiveness is a choice just like any other.

 

WHY I LOSE INTEREST

I had eventually lost interest in every relationship I was in. I’m trying to think about what exactly this means.

Losing interest was my personal epidemic. People have told me it is because I don’t fall in love easily.

In the past, I fell in love but didn’t stay in love. Falling in love was based on focusing on the good in the man I was with until finding out something that changed my perception of him. I have been in love before but I’ve never been with a man and thought, “He’s the one.” Even when I thought I thought it, I knew I actually didn’t.

As far as LoA was concerned, I got what I had asked for. I was only comfortable loving while love lasted without effort, only for as long as I was interested in his positive traits. I guess I never considered any of those men someone I’d be proud to call my partner in the long run.

I did not need any of my chosen partners to be classically good looking, rich or anything else that was physical or material – I only wanted to see something in a man that was different. Special. I didn’t ask for anything but positive and caring personality, manners and a man who created a life for himself he genuinely enjoyed.

Once, my then-boyfriend sat on the only free bar stool while we were out with friends, without even offering it to me first and leaving me standing while he sat down without blinking. I was embarrassed. Not about what others might think, especially since most didn’t give the situation a second thought, but embarrassed with myself for having been in a relationship with an idiot. When the same then-boyfriend and I were walking in the street one day, he suddenly disappeared without a word because he saw someone he knew across the street and ran to say hello without giving me a heads up. I walked for another two seconds before realizing I was walking on my own. In my mind, he instantly became an unequivocal idiot.

The sad thing is, I have even “better” stories from this particular relationship. And by sad, I mean tragicomic. What I actually mean is hilarious.

To be fair, this was in my early to mid-twenties and taught me that someone being “a good guy” was just not enough. I used to say I liked “good guys” and thought that one being “good” or “nice” was enough. I had completely ignored my taste for basic sophistication, personality wise. That kind of sophistication requires self-comfort, confidence and an open heart. Heart driven individuals have it while those driven by insecurity block their own sense of self love. I like good men but I also like quality men and goodness is just one, possibly the core but still not the only trait of overall quality.

This relationship was a lesson in quality. Manners don’t take wealthy or privileged background but only a little intelligence and common sense. A lack thereof could have come from one’s old, negative habits with less-than-quality women (or maybe I acted like one in part, who knows). Maybe it had something to do with low quality upbringing but eventually, we have to reevaluate the “values” we were raised on and create our own.

Again, I was younger then (I turn thirty two on January 5th) but these incidents were enough for me to stop respecting my then-boyfriend.

Now, what did LoA bring me as a result of this?

When one stop respecting another, they set the relationship up for a free fall. I started to keep him around as I pleased, felt free to start arguments as I pleased without worrying if raising my voice when I did would hurt his feelings. Later on, leaving him caused growth in my self-respect; it wasn’t difficult for me to do because I already loved myself enough to put myself first and know that everything was going to be okay.

 

A LESSON IN FORGIVENESS

I’ve been asked how to forgive. Some might argue that I don’t have much experience with forgiveness but as much as I believe one can talk their relationship issues out lovingly, especially if they genuinely love the person in question, I didn’t want to in this case. Others might say I’m too critical but I’m not perfect, just like anyone else – I am however fair and devoid of hypocrisy, as I only stay put for as long as I want to, never fake or pretend and am always honest. When I give something a chance, I mean it. When I’m unhappy, I leave. Living this honest life is the only way I can be happy.

I make decisions according to my feelings and personal values.

You can however choose to love and forgive your (desired) significant others for absolutely anything. You can choose to love them despite their faults but it must be a decision you will stick to.

You must forgive and stick to it the way I chose to leave and stuck to it.

You might wonder how to forgive and the answer is, by being strong. It takes strength to stay and it takes strength to leave, your relationship or any other manifestation you want to bring about.

If you want to forgive yourself and everyone in your past, appreciating the lessons you learned, do it. You are allowed to forgive and move away from the individuals who do nothing to contribute to your happiness.

But…

If you decide to forgive someone you still want in your life, look at it as starting over. Create the new present and forget the past. Be strong enough to do that.

You Get What You Give in Manifesting Relationships

You Get What You Give in Manifesting Relationships

You get what you give – we often hear this phrase when dealing with LoA. I often say it but I find it comforting. Why shouldn’t I receive a great life while sending positive vibes out into the world?

But what does this idea mean in terms of manifesting relationships?

“You get what you give” means being an amazing person and believing that your partner is one so that you could attract the kind of relationship you want with that person. If you believe that the both of you are amazing people, you will believe in the possibility of your desired relationship with that person. Whether you are manifesting being with a specific or a generic person you haven’t met yet, it means knowing that the relationship you want is yours and being the kind of person that deserves it, which means being the person who is convinced of deserving to live their desires.

You already are an amazing person and so is the person you are manifesting being with. Now, all you have to do is believe in it. Neither of you needs to be superhuman – you are both amazing just as you are.

I use the term “amazing” but you can use any term you want – “great,” “kind,” “good” or simply, “deserving.” Use anything you want!

If you don’t believe that you can manifest your desire just yet, make sure to be the kind of person you admire! Accept that you are good enough now but if you need to, improve yourself as well. Do the things you always wanted to do. Contribute to yourself and the world. Do whatever you need to do in order to finally realize that you are an amazing individual.

You must love yourself first so that you could love another and offer them a reason to come into your life.

LAYING THE GROUNDWORK

When manifesting relationships, laying the groundwork is important in order to offer someone else a happy partnership. You are making sure you’re happy so that you could be the perfect partner.

If you feel that way already, just ask and receive but if you feel like you need some prep, keep reading.

Many want to manifest a relationship at the time they are unhappy which doesn’t make them a good partner. This is manifesting out of need, not love. Instead, these individuals need to be happy with what they already have in order to gain even more and be an amazing partner just the way they are.

Manifesting relationships is a serious thing because you must be a quality person in order to attract a quality partner and relationship. If you don’t feel good enough, the problem lies in your beliefs about what exactly quality means.

Too many people fear that quality means physical perfection, financial wealth, fame, fortune and similar things. They base the idea of quality on the external factors so much that they forget it is all about the internal. Not even your looks mean anything because it is all about your inner energy and if you look back on your life, you would understand why this is true, especially after observing your past relationships.

I realized a long time ago that looks, age, financial wealth or any other external factors don’t matter. Only those who think their looks and similar factors matter end up lowering their level of attraction to others. Those who believe that everyone will deem them amazing only if they do so themselves end up attracting whomever they want!

For all these reasons, giving love to yourself means laying the groundwork for a successful relationship.

LoA in Your Living Situation – Do You Create a Positive Home Dynamics?

LoA in Your Living Situation – Do You Create a Positive Home Dynamics?

Throughout my life, I have lived alone, with my parents, with roommates and with a boyfriend. This great variety in dynamics allowed me to learn some appreciation factors as well as coping mechanisms.

Looking back, I think that a part of me wanted to spend a significant amount of time in all these living situations, just like I ultimately did. I wanted to learn and experience them all in my twenties. Twice, I lived with a close friend and we are still close today. One of them has a birthday today and I just sent her my greetings. We lived together in a beautiful apartment she owns and I still remember her first birthday after I moved in. I bought her a black dress as a gift. Another time, I lived with two roommates but we are no longer in touch. Living alone proved to be a beneficial setup to me because it had provided me all the time to myself I need to recharge my batteries.

Over the past ten years, I have studied the differences among all these living situations. Seeing the ways in which one manifests them was most interesting. To be fair, the constant boredom in my twenties caused me to change my living situation as I pleased yet it enriched my knowledge of life which was my ultimate goal.

Just like anything else, LoA can cause one’s living situation to change instantly if they so choose. You want to live alone, with amazing roommates or a partner? I have helped my friends manifest all these circumstances and did so in my own life.

Do you want to own a home or rent one? I never wanted to own until deciding where I wanted to settle down.

I still don’t want to own. I know how to manifest my desires but haven’t decided what all of them are. If you have, there is no reason why you shouldn’t manifest them now!

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS

Roommates or a partner involved, the most valuable lesson I learned was that those who gave me the freedom I needed were those I liked living with. Throughout my living situations, I took my study of relationships among people even further.

Roommates and partners sharing a home love to spend time together but when one wants their freedom, the other will achieve best results in granting that freedom to them.

What does it mean to give freedom when the other needs it?

If one states their plans, the other knows how to respect them. For example, if one’s partner wants to go meet an old friend, the other should simply let them do so..and they know it. However, trying to guilt one’s partner into bringing them along to an appointment they don’t need to be a part of means denying the other’s freedom.

The biggest problem needy partners or roommates have is that we are all attuned to each other’s energy. When completely relaxed and content all on our own, we sense the neediness of others projected onto us. A constructive move and positive suggestions are completely different from the words of someone who has the need to spend all their time with us.

This is why it is difficult for many to intuitively connect with their potential romantic partners – many are nervous and tense around those they wish to start a relationship with, making it impossible to truly observe the other’s thoughts, awareness, energy and reasons for specific behaviors. Distress of this kind causes neediness projected onto a potential partner in various ways, as well as one’s own train wreck of a thought process.

Relax! Life doesn’t happen without it.

WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT TO YOU?

In short, is it your goal to live alone, with a significant other or a roommate you absolutely adore? Or, do you have your eyes on a specific (type of) house or apartment, basing your new living situation on that factor? Is there a specific city you want to live in? Whatever the answer, you can manifest what you want.

Some have already found a setup that works for the time being but might want to manifest a different type of home or move to a different location. Either way, the goal is to appreciate everything you have in your current home in order to manifest a new one.

Appreciating your current living situation will lead you to your desired one. Once you are capable of being grateful for your current living situation, you will be able to imagine yourself living the way you want.

I have had a variety of life situation goals throughout my life. Whatever yours may be, appreciate what you can about your current living situation and you will attract an even better one. Also remember that creation principles apply regardless of the specific desire you may have.

Your visualization is supposed to make you feel good! If you think about living the life that makes you happy, you will feel good. If you are trying to push your dream life into manifesting (finally!), you probably feel awful.

Never allow your current circumstances to make you feel that life will never get better. Life will only get as good as you allow it.

Are You Afraid to Let Go?

Are You Afraid to Let Go?

The fear of letting go only means you are not vibrating at a high enough frequency to live your desire just yet.

This is why we can only see ourselves having our desires when we’re happy. Makes sense, right?

It’s amazing what we can see ourselves having when we’re happy. In 2011, I manifested an all-expenses-paid trip to Brazil. I was already vibrating at a high level and dared to believe that this was mine. I was already in a happy relationship, living in a city I loved, doing my Master’s and manifested this without a problem. Isn’t that a great lesson in loving your current life in order to manifest even more into it?

If you fear letting go, you are actually in fear of your life staying the same in case you should suddenly let go of your desire. However, you fall into the wrong way of thinking when this becomes your perception, as letting go allows your desires to manifest instead of vaporize.

Law of Attraction can be confusing because it is the opposite of what many have grown up believing.

When you are happy, you can imagine yourself having anything you want. I understand that sometimes, a struggle lies in having to make your current life happy when all you want to do is escape; however, why should any part of your life ever be unhappy? Don’t you deserve to have fun, be happy and feel fulfilled no matter what you do?

You can love your current life and manifest your dream one.

Those who fall into the trap of trying to make their current reality happier without trying often attempt to manifest signs of their desires manifesting. If they fail to see a specific sign just once, their vibration is at lowers without effort. Instead, they should appreciate everything they already have – cook an extravagant meal, go out with their friends, play with their dogs, go shopping, have a bubble bath, pick out work outfits for the following days, read a book, see a movie, listen to music, donate some money or clothes, manifest some money just for fun, go for a walk, visit their parents or get a mani pedi.

Regardless of where I am, I like to focus on the parts of it I find beautiful, tasteful, stimulating, fun, relaxing or just happy. I love good food and coffee. I love clothes, organic cosmetics and great conversations. I love spreading good mood onto others. I love animals, music, dancing and laughing, writing, books, acting and movies. I love both traveling and photography. I love dog walking. I love spending time with my friends. I could go on but you get the idea.

I have recently learned that essential oils are a proven method of raising one’s vibration, as they naturally vibrate on high frequencies. Last summer, I used my oil burner as usual but for the first time, I started to feel different. I didn’t know if it meant anything until just weeks ago, when I was told about this natural quality of essential oils. Then, I received an article corroborating the claim. Now that you know this, do you see yourself even happier at home while enjoying this fragrance bliss?

I used to use essential oils often but since discovering their most amazing benefits, I’ve been using them daily.

Last week, I attended the opening of an exhibit by an accomplished photographer and artist. His pieces striking  and stimulating, the audience a mix of acquaintances, friends, celebrities and new faces with a private concert as well as traditional catering, this event provided for a great reminder of the many lovely individuals I know and the fun I can have.

Here’s a quick snap on the way out:

Several weeks ago, my 13-year-old cousin had her first night on the town. My friends and I took her out on a Saturday night, giving her a taste of the party scene. She had an amazing time. She was dressed trendy while I went slightly classic but sexy. My friends treated her as an equal. She was up for a good time, fun conversations and discussing the cutest member of One Direction. She drank Coke while we drank gin and tonic in great moderation. She laughed while I sang loudly and danced to Wham! in my seat, with one of my friends. She was entertained by funny boyfriend stories. The police greeted us in the street. We made sure that by law, she had no curfew if accompanied by an adult and knew the places we were allowed to take her as long as she steered clear of alcohol. Our late night cab ride home was also fun, as the dancing never stopped. It was a great night.

Saturday night, I visited family friends. The meal served resembled a French cuisine spread – various types of cheese, home-made bread, select meats, olives and red wine. I couldn’t believe how much I ate. The conversation ignited many laughs. At one point, the group split into sports followers that occupied the living room and coffee-drinking, current events discussion participants who remained in the dining room. Then, it was men and women separately.

All these examples provide proof that we all have the ability to make our lives interesting but fun. Perceiving your own life as interesting and fun just as it is allows you to raise your vibration and bring even more love into it. Positive events such as these allow you to feel love for yourself, your life and all the exciting parts of it while suddenly giving you a chance to be able to see yourself living your dream life.

I’m off to buy more candles and essential oils.