travel photography Vicenza Italy June 2018

No Pain From the Past Should Make the Present Difficult

The Law of Attraction is not about making your life seem perfect or pretending that it is.

It is about knowing that your positivity, happiness, choices and desires make you who you are, not a difficult day or circumstance that simply comes and goes.

Nearly every time anyone asked me if I had faced a specific challenge at some point in life, the answer was “yes.”  We all have, at least once. But it doesn’t matter. It’s not a big deal.

Challenges don’t define us – they only define those who don’t seem to want to recover from them but why let a difficult moment from once upon a time define your fate and personality?

This can particularly be applied to wanting to manifest happiness but blocking yourself with fears from your past negative experiences. If you look within, you will already see that those experiences are not who you are. For the most part, they didn’t even involve your decisions so how can they be defining you? Things we manifest unintentionally are often not what we intended but who cares?

If we manifest something we don’t like, we can just fix it. So why worry about life, ever?

This already shows us that we don’t need to worry about anything. Life is lightness – that is what it’s meant to be.

Years ago, my then boyfriend broke up with me. Break-ups are such a common topic so let’s discuss this one. I didn’t even like him all that much anymore, especially towards the end, but had gotten annoyed that someone I didn’t think much of ended it at the time. I wanted it to end as well but he had said it first so for a few days, I was irritated that someone I thought so little of ended it…until I remembered that the only relevant factor was that I wanted it to be over and that a hurt ego was simply not me. It wasn’t anything I had ever cared about before and I went back to not caring about it once again. I was just glad that it was over because my life was much happier without someone whose attitude I was finding depressing for the most part. But if you have been broke up with by a person you still care about, remember your love for them and start over. Rebuild that love and start to see them in a positive light again – in any breakup, mutual negativity and fears prevailed. If someone broke up with you, you will discover that you didn’t exactly think well of them either at that time but your positive feelings can always be rebuilt if you want to be with this person once again.

It doesn’t matter what happened and surprised you. It only matters what you choose.

It is your choices that make you who you are, not somebody else’s. If someone broke up with you, what will define you is the knowing that your relationship with them is a done deal, if you want to manifest it back, and not allowing any of life’s events but your choices alone to define you instead.

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How To Put Our Goal Preventing Issues Behind Us

We often forget that relationship focus and coaching exist beyond simply manifesting the relationship you want. Once it’s manifested, you must keep it, and you will do so by dealing with your deepest issues which every one of your relationship problems came from in the past. If you deal with those, Law of Attraction will draw even more love into your romance than you had before because resolving your issues results in feeling good about yourself, finally attracting your dreams as a result. 

That is how the process goes.

An existing couple is no different – they might get over a fight but the same issues will keep causing new ones in the future unless they are resolved. It’s not about the fight itself but about what causes it, and unless that issue causing a fight is addressed, it will keep coming back in different forms.

Some prefer to believe that the cause of a single fight was their partner’s reaction to our words, their words or specific actions; however, the cause of a fight lies in one’s (or both parties’) issues that have existed long before they even met their partner. When a fight happens, we don’t react to something we don’t care about. We actually react because our partner’s words or actions reminded us of an unpleasant feeling we’ve been holding onto for a while before we met them. We then project their words onto those feelings and end up upset, disregarding the notion they never meant to upset us and were just expressing themselves while we took it the way we did.

Fights can take over a relationship and we shouldn’t let them. Actually facing and dealing with those issues leading to them by causing us to be upset at someone’s words are what we should actually be facing. We have to be honest with ourselves about those issues if we want them to disappear and stop making us miserable, and we can make LoA work for us by doing so.

Issues can be dealt with in two ways – by thinking positive about ourselves and everything in our lives which leads us to easily resolving them by realizing we have outgrown them, or by facing them and realizing why they don’t matter anymore. Either way, it is by devaluing them because negative thoughts can cause misery if we choose to give them meaning.

We are much better off knowing our true self is stronger than any negative thoughts we may be holding on to. What hurts you doesn’t deserve you, and it certainly doesn’t deserve your attention.

Think well of yourself and think about those you love and admire. Focus on the people whose company you adore, and imagine spending time with them. All these things will shift your focus to personal happiness which leads to confidence in yourself and seeing yourself having what you want.

I have always had a very specific trigger to negative feelings in a relationship. I value feeling special and seeing myself as such, and when a boyfriend makes me feel anything but, my taste for the relationship starts to wane. In a relationship, I always give what I wish to receive by expressing how much my partner means to me yet my patience for being with someone who doesn’t express himself well enough has left me over the years. I want someone who dares to say what he means, has the courage to dive into love, be romantic and show me how much I mean to him.

In the past, I would summon enough love to see beyond hearing what I didn’t like but today, I want someone who sees and realizes that I want to be put first, because I put my  partner first. Those who have no interest in doing this can move along.

Sometimes, it is easier for us to say that we “feel like this is happening, that’s how it’s gonna play out” and let the Law of Attraction work – this particular mindset can be an easy way out when it comes to manifesting relationships, as we sometimes feel more natural thinking that the outcome is our of our control. However, even when we “can feel the relationship will go this way,” we are choosing this outcome for our lives!

Every “feeling” you think may have come from somewhere else was also your choice to acknowledge and embrace, and with that, give meaning to and decide that it was to be the outcome of your manifestation; now, since you know that, choose the outcome you want and decide that that one was meant to be! 

We choose the outcome of every situation, even when we don’t think we do. 

And at times, I focused on what I didn’t like to the extend that I had to decide if whether I wanted to stay or leave the relationship.

If the situation doesn’t suit you and you don’t want to fix it, walk away. Time is much better spent thinking about having what you want than disliking what you have. Some issues in a relationship we don’t care to fix.

If you want to fix your own issues on the other hand, preventing them from interfering with your future relationship with the right person, face them and realize that they’re probably outdated. Chances are you already spent a sufficient amount of time dealing with them and it is time to put them behind you – this very notion is often enough to stop thinking about a problem.

If you want closure, visualizing a positive scenario in which your issue has been resolved. Visualize injustice corrected and a chance to tell someone what you wish to tell them. Imagine this playing out in your perfect but positive scenario because visualizing it in a negative and upset way will not make it go away.

Then, you will automatically put it behind you for good. 

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Don’t Lose It Before You Attract It!

Do you fear losing what you have or worse, losing your desired manifestation before you attract it?

Fear of loss (or, fear of failure, if you prefer) usually happens after experiencing an unexpected loss in life – loss of a job, a relationship or one’s happiness or confidence at the least expected moment. The moment one finds oneself blindsided by something they thought would never happen to them, usually a break-up or something of similar magnitude – big enough to cause confidence issues but not so big that the damage is irreversible – fear of loss is created, causing insecurity and self-doubt. And when it comes to manifesting one’s desires, fear of loss works even before one manifests their desire, keeping it at arm’s length.

One’s desired manifestation is closer than they think but the fear of loss keeps it from manifesting in the first place.

I don’t want to say that you can’t lose what you never had in the first place because you can have anything you want if you believe it; however, I will say that the desire to have specific things in life always comes with fear if it stems from need.

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Thought of the Day

If instead of your true heart’s desire you accept one deemed easier to manifest, it isn’t fair to anyone involved.

If you should accept any goal you consider easier to manifest than your true heart’s desire, this isn’t fair to you or anyone else.

What we want wants us back.

The Universe wants to give you what you want.

Your true heart’s desire wants you just as much as you want it.

common daisy flower grass flowers photography nature beauty beautiful

Manifestation Epidemic – How Can I Ignore the Current Reality?

Fully ignoring your current reality and just thinking about your desired one is a technique in itself, if you ask me. If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you know that I fully advocate ignoring the current reality (or if you seem to be unable to, turning every negative in it into a positive, i.e. “It’s good that I’m single now because I get to do all the things I enjoy but will have less time for once in a relationship” etc.) and if you can just ignore everything in front of you, your visualizations of the ideal will trickle down to your current reality in order to turn it into your ideal one.

Many have wondered how exactly to ignore their current realities, and the answer is…

Ignoring the current reality comes easy when one makes a habit of practicing self-love. Being unable to ignore the current reality happens when that reality strongly bothers you but self-love leads to “fixing” yourself and your current reality by extension.

See how that goes?

If you ever wondered why self-love is key, you just got the answers you were looking for.

Crazy as it sounds, the easiest way to ignore the current reality is to fill it with fun activities. That way, you just happily live and have fun while imagining your ideal reality but not missing it. You don’t even think about it – you just are.

Another way is to love your ideal reality so much that it even transforms your current reality. Even if you never did it, it can be done. I’ve done it. When you love your ideal reality that much, you begin to act as if you’re living it in your current. You start to transfer moods, mindsets and external factors. You begin to look and dress the part.

Now that you know how it works, use these exercises to create your new life.

morning coffee back yard garden spring sun sunny day warm

Thought of the Day

It isn’t that seemingly worrying things never happen in my life – it is that I say “It’ll change to what I want” and stick with it until it does.

It is that I decide that what I want is a done deal. I am aware that talking about the bad or worse can only cause harm.

It is that I know that if I trust the Universe and feel happy about what I want, as if I have it already, I am going to get it.

It is that not knowing what I want is always the cause of unhappiness…and I am aware of it. Not anything or anyone else – just me. And knowing it is knowing how to fix it.

Are You Surrounded with True Friends?

Some of the recent events around me as well as many comments and emails prompted me to address the following:

Are your friends, family and other people close to you genuinely happy for your success in life, your positive personality and all the love, magic and gratitude you are attracting into your life?

Let’s be clear on something – they should be!

No matter what goes on in your life, you are a great friend if you’re unconditionally happy for your own friends and their success. Those who support your goals and desires are good friends and those who don’t are only expressing their limiting beliefs, making themselves less-than-exceptional friends in the process.

If someone’s constant negativity hurts your happiness and life, you can remove yourself from that person and seek out positive company instead. There is no reason not to.

Or, if this is a relationship you want to repair, you can do so as well. It’s up to you but either way, here’s what to do. 

Manifestation Epidemic – Trying to Manifest while Attempting to Fix the Current Reality

If the Law of Attraction confuses you at times, you probably find yourself bouncing from the thoughts of living your desire to the thoughts of not having it in your current reality just yet. This is one of the most common manifestation and LoA teaching problems; it is where attachment and the refusal to let go rule one’s awareness.

In short,

If you can’t take the focus off your current reality, your desired one isn’t making you happy enough…yet. You must make the visualizations and feelings of having your desire more vivid, creative and reflecting what you want instead of what you don’t or what you fear having to settle for.

If you pay equal attention to your positive and negative thoughts, you are stuck between the realities, so to speak. However, focusing on your desired reality is always the answer. The more you nurture positive feelings about your desired reality, the more your current one will fade.

Can you imagine what your life would look like if your entire visualization focus rested on having and living your desire already? It would be everything you see and it would lead to manifestation. You wouldn’t think twice about still living your current reality and you would start to enjoy it while knowing that your desired reality is coming.

When manifesting anything you can imagine, I consider it a done deal. All my happiness goes into the thoughts of living my desire which takes the focus off my current reality, allowing me to live it and stop paying attention to the insignificant details in it. As I enjoy these visualizations, my awareness soaks up the feeling of having what I want. With my desire in my life, I imagine it to be inspiring, positively challenging and full of enjoyment.

When you make your desired reality that happy, the current becomes something you don’t even think about. You don’t mind it and might start to enjoy it as a result. In addition, this approach is pure self love due to the giving of love to yourself and having your desire.

If you can’t take the focus off your current reality, you will as soon as you make your desired one more engaging in your mind. Then, you will also let go to manifest.

At the same time, impatience and a lack of self love prevent many from entirely letting go of the current reality and putting their faith into the desired; instead, many look for short-term solutions and “steps” to manifest their desire slowly, wanting to feel happy now without having to take the time to locate their limiting beliefs and personal manifesting blocks.

Some refuse to let go due to the fear of actually manifesting their desire, feeling undeserving of that manifestation and fearing its eventual loss instead of praising its gain and presence. If this is you, repeating the affirmation “I am good enough” whenever you feel the need is going to work for you.