Are You Surrounded with True Friends?

Some of the recent events around me as well as many comments and emails prompted me to address the following:

Are your friends, family and other people close to you genuinely happy for your success in life, your positive personality and all the love, magic and gratitude you are attracting into your life?

Let’s be clear on something – they should be!

No matter what goes on in your life, you are a great friend if you’re unconditionally happy for your own friends and their success. Those who support your goals and desires are good friends and those who don’t are only expressing their limiting beliefs, making themselves less-than-exceptional friends in the process.

If someone’s constant negativity hurts your happiness and life, you can remove yourself from that person and seek out positive company instead. There is no reason not to.

Or, if this is a relationship you want to repair, you can do so as well. It’s up to you but either way, here’s what to do. 

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How Do You See Yourself (and Your Life)?

Have you ever heard anyone say that you should be ready to do whatever it takes to manifest your desire?

Even if you heard this, you may have wondered what it meant.

It means doing all the self-work necessary to manifest – feeling good, thinking positive thoughts, choosing positive feelings, focusing on having your desired reality and expecting your desired manifestation to happen.

Many start off thinking positively and believing, only to give up later.

Too many haven’t grown up naturally thinking positive; they were taught to believe that life is difficult or that they should never hope because they will be disappointed. Others fear their past experiences repeating, currently seeing themselves as having been hurt instead of cherishing their strength and happiness.

If you believe life is difficult, you are captured in an awareness of being a person who struggles. Beliefs indicate awareness and those who believe they must wait or struggle believe that getting what they want is always difficult for them. There is no reason to believe this about yourself – start believing that from now on, life is easy because you deserve it.

Thinking that hope always leads to disappointment is also a matter of awareness, as you believe that this always happens to you. If you hope yet fear disappointment, you are setting yourself up for that disappointment. Expect to receive your desire and be happy instead of let down.

Fearing that the past will repeat itself means you haven’t forgiven yourself for it. Don’t think that the past has to repeat itself because nothing has to happen unless you believe it. If you can’t imagine what a happier future would look like, get creative and think about what you want it to look like. Since you can have anything, why not manifest what you actually want, for a change?

You know you can do this.

 

Have You Earned a Great Relationship?

This post first appeared on my (first) blog, https://improvingconfidence.wordpress.com/

I continuously encounter individuals who believe a great relationship is something they are entitled to.

A great relationship is something everyone deserves, just like any other blessing in life. Everyone deserves to experience happiness but those that receive it have in fact earned it with their positive mindsets, respect for others and gratitude for their lives.

Everyone deserves it but a positive individual earns it, allowing a happy relationship to come into their reality.

On the other hand, those projecting negative energy (be it frustration, desperation, negative self-image, impatience, rudeness or general dissatisfaction) are continuously preventing what they deserve, a great relationship in this case, to appear in their lives.

You get what you give; genuine appreciation for life, your own and those of others, ensures you will receive an abundance of goodness in return. You merely need to find that appreciation.

The idea of an amazing relationship being earned holds truth but requires explanation; stating this idea as simply as it looks in writing may evoke negative reactions instead of positive. One becomes worthy of a great relationship by viewing oneself in a positive light, focusing on everything they enjoy in life, respecting one’s unique qualities as well as the qualities of others and having personal integrity that ensures standing by one’s personal beliefs.

Many believe they must earn a great relationship by fulfilling requirements such as career success, a larger-than-life personality, financial wealth or being classically good looking. However, basic creation principles state that one’s beliefs create one’s awareness; for example, individuals who deeply believe they cannot earn a great relationship until they have a great job will encounter specific experiences reflecting those beliefs.

Truth is, the relationship you desire has nothing to do with your social status unless you decide to believe it. Those who stick to beliefs such as “Once I get a good job, I will have inner peace and be ready for a relationship” will most likely find that the job, the relationship and the inner peace continue to elude them. Postponing those experiences by masking them as future goals will ensure they remain distant goals, making it impossible to catch up to that “perfect future.”

Now, I am not saying your desires are irrelevant but for as long as you think “I’ll be confident once I have this,” you are creating a future goal that will always remain in the future. In reality, you must feel deserving of your goals now and be confident in yourself before you can obtain them.

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Contrary to popular belief, relationships have nothing to do with your social status, level of wealth, professional success or your looks. When it comes to relationships, you merely need to be confident in the person you are. You need to draw your confidence from internal factors instead of external. You need to recognize your personal qualities, the beauty of your physical traits, your intelligence and gratitude for everything you have in life.

One of the best ways to earn a great relationship rests in developing self-confidence, self-comfort and self-acceptance.

Amplifying those character traits with a positive mindset will allow you to focus on everything you love in life instead of everything you are currently missing. If you focus on your positive traits, you will effortlessly focus on your (potential) partner’s positive traits, enjoying your relationship immensely and solving problems in it easily. Suddenly, you will come to realize relationships were intended to be easy and enjoyable instead of being a constant ego battle between opposing sides. If you have an eye on a potential partner, you will be encouraged to communicate with them as you have recognized your own qualities while appreciating them for theirs. You will realize how much there is to be liked about you!

If you believe your looks are insufficient to evoke attraction in another, you will project an unhappy demeanor, tension and insecurity. The best part is, you can decide to focus on the aspects of your appearance you like instead. You can appreciate your beauty instead of focusing on the reasons it is less than perfect. This positive energy will evoke even more of the same, allowing you to feel increasingly great about yourself.

Ultimately, is there a real reason you should feel negatively about your appearance? Everyone holds a different idea of what beauty means. More importantly, we all respond to each other’s energy much stronger than any physical attributes – every time you were attracted someone who wasn’t your “type” proves that.

Do you compare yourself to others? This is another mistake which can prevent you from receiving life’s goods. Do you believe you must match an ideal another specific person represents to you while considering anything “less” to be insufficient? This mindset only states your lack of appreciation for yourself, as you feel undeserving of love. Even if you think your (potential) partner only wants the ideal you have imagined him/her wanting, it doesn’t mean you’re right.

We all know the story – one perceives their desired partner to be “too good for me.” “He/She is out of my league,” they imagine, never making a move or deeming themselves worthy. This thought process is perpetuated until the object of their affection meets someone else.

There are plenty of similar examples. However, it all comes down to the following.

Searching for the reasons to postpone living a happy relationship only shows that you doubt your own value. If recognizing the said value undoubtedly ensures finding a great relationship, what is the point of feeling inadequate?

Do You Admire YOU?

At various times, I mentioned being the person you admire. This concept entails self love, confidence, appreciation and possessing specific character traits you admire. For others, this concept means being perfectly satisfied with yourself, considering yourself perfectly fine, if not great, just the way you are already. Some want to improve upon their self image and others like their own already.

Those who want to improve upon their self image are advised to take actions that reflect being the person they wish to be. If you want to be more outgoing, think about the way you want to approach people and what you would want them to see in you. If you want to be more emotionally open, decide that you are courageous enough to engage in any emotion-filled conversation or that you are ready to start showing those you love how much they mean to you.

You get the idea.

And, you can use LoA to get there.

One of my friends wanted to relax around other people. This person was often concerned whether or not others were quick to judge and was afraid of looking silly; with that, my friend worried that everyone else was more interesting, attractive, intelligent and fascinating.

In truth, one is advised to take qualities they admire and apply them to oneself. Think about it – what is it that makes you interesting, fascinating, attractive… Which specific traits do you like about yourself and how could you develop those you want to add to the list?

Another friend of mine made a point of communicating with every person they were attracted to. This amounted to a quick exchange in some cases and a date in others but my friend eventually relaxed around their persons of interest greatly, especially after realizing the problem was self-imposed in the first place.

Whatever you struggle with, never feel like you are less important or interesting than others. Everyone has struggled with something at some point and your personal struggles are not embarrassing. All of us excel at different things but deciding what you wish to excel at when it comes to your personality will take you to your desired awareness.